Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Speaking of Love #23

No, I don't understand my husband's theory of relativity, but I know my husband and I know he can be trusted.
~ Elsa Einstein
(This was a quote I'd never heard before, but I just love it!  The simple trust of a husband is a beautiful thing for a wife to possess.)

For the remaining days of this month, I want to share some of the love letters Jeff has given me during the years of our marriage.  It's difficult to leave so many wonderful letters from before our wedding unshared; but perhaps at another time in another forum, I'll be able to include those.  Recently I had been thinking of sharing letters from our married years anyway, but dear Anne's question (about whether Jeff is still so romantic) in her comment on this post  prompted me even more to dig out some gems from a husband to his wife.

Before I share a love letter tonight, I'll try to answer Anne's question briefly.  

Yes and no.

Was that brief enough?  ;-)

I'm no good at being concise; there's always so much I want to say about every topic imaginable!  And especially a topic as important and complex as this one - well, I could run on and on with my words.  But let me get started with this tonight, and perhaps I'll continue more in future posts.

First, even though Jeff is still gifted with his tongue and his pen and is an eloquent communicator, he does not often write me love letters.  Why?  Because he doesn't need to.  We live with each other after all, and nearly every day we have some time to talk and connect and get a feel for what the other one is going through.  Is it more romantic to be separated by distance during engagement and pour strong emotions into lovely letters?  Yes, I suppose it is.  But no doubt about it, I'd rather--oh, so much rather--have my man here with me, where I can tell with a glance when he's downcast and he knows without words that something is bothering me and we can sit together and express our hearts and fill each other's love tanks...even if it is in a more unromantic way.

These are some of the ways we show love these days:  
~ when he gets home from work and I've got supper ready and I'm hungry and the family is waiting, but he's got his mind set on fiddling around with an old TV he brought home from work so he can see if it will connect to the DVD player so the boys can watch movies, and he asks for a few more minutes, but I want him to stop what he's doing right now so we can eat...I've learned to bite my tongue (I was hungry after all so why not chew on a tongue?)  :)  and stop the exasperated words from coming forth...I've also learned to not huff around and display with my body language a sour, selfish attitude...that's love...this was, by the way, an exact situation I struggled with a few days ago; and it wasn't easy!  :)
~ yesterday morning, I was feeling blah; and as Jeff and I crossed paths in the get-breakfast-for-the-kids-and-build-up-the-fire-and-do-the-regular-morning-stuff routine, he sensed that something was bothering me...I shrugged him off, but he followed me up the steps on my way to take a shower to ask me what was wrong...that's love...I didn't know what to say, so I really didn't say anything...but during my shower, I realized how unfair that was, and I determined to find a moment to communicate with him before he left for work so that he wouldn't be wondering all day what was wrong with me and whether he had done something to upset me...I still didn't know how to put my feelings in words very well, but I tried my best to think of a succinct way of letting him know what I was struggling with--and most importantly, that he hadn't done anything wrong and I wasn't unhappy with him...before I could even get the words out though, he said, "I've got a block of free time this afternoon with no haircuts scheduled; if you can find someone to watch the kids, do you want to meet me for a lunch date?"...that's love

Is it incredibly romantic?  The stuff of Hollywood movies and Hallmark cards?  The kind of thing that makes hearers be awestruck?  Not at all.  But it is love--deep, abiding love built on mutual admiration and respect and caring.  At this stage of life, it is so rich and rewarding and comfortable (in the best possible way) to be loved like that.

So much more begs to be said about this, of course; but for tonight, I'll simply continue by sharing an undated letter that Jeff wrote me, probably in the fall of 1998--or maybe 1999?--I'm really drawing a blank.  

Jeff wrote the letter on a card graced with Renoir's famous painting "El columpio."  Look it up on Google Images, and you'll see one of my favorite Renoir paintings.  (Not that I'm any kind of expert when it comes to art, because I'm really an ignoramus.  My only claim to knowledge comes from the fact that my father-in-law was a professional artist.  That should count for something, right?)  :)

Inside the card he wrote this letter...
Hey there, Lover Girl - 

It's been some time now since I've written you a letter so I thought today a good day!

I just want you to know how much I appreciate you - all your continual acts of service...laundry, cooking, cleaning, lunches, etc, etc.  You are an inspiration to me.

I am proud to be your husband - proud of the way you serve God's people with the beauty of your voice, the power of your fingers, [with a piano keyboard and music notes drawn beside the text], and the way you always are willing to lend a helping hand.

I am really going to miss you during Christmas...it won't be the same without you.  But we can get a tree after Canada and have the "spirit" before you go - maybe exchange a few gifts before and after!  That'll be fun.

Well, I am missing you here at work today - thank you in advance for the great host you are and will be tonight - I sure pray Steve and his wife become disciples of Christ.

I love you most of all.  :)

Jeffrey

And on the back of the card, he added:

Today, I am in the mood to be a parent.  I know you'll make a terrific mother one day!

Well, if that isn't romantic, I don't know what is!!  :)

2 comments:

Homeschool on the Croft said...

I love the last line! Praise God that this desire has been fulfilled.

And thank you for taking time to answer the question. Give me a husband who will ask me how I'm feeling a hundred times over one who'll bring me gifts. I really mean that. At this stage especially, having a gentle, although passionate too!, calm, deep love is so much more than I could have dreamt of.... and, sadly, so much more than many people know anything of.

I'm loving your 'love' series. Just lovin' it x

Margie said...

It IS romantic. And Elsa Einstein's quote is, too. That's love. All of it.