Portrait of My Boys

(Well, of three of them anyway.) 

My boys love each other deeply - I have no doubt of that.  But sometimes, they struggle with the liking-each-other part.  As I've mentioned before on the blog, we do have our fair share of friction between the siblings in this household; but because of that, I notice and treasure all the more the times when they dwell in peace and joy together.  If they would just give up their selfishness, they would certainly have a lot more fun!!  (I suppose the same could be said to me!)

Yesterday morning was one of those blessed moments when the noises that rang out from them were happy ones - not yelling and bickering, but laughing.  I've come to the conclusion that I don't mind noise, as long as it's happy noise; and yesterday I got to hear a lot of that.  I'm not sure who came up with this idea; but my oldest three somehow decided to each get a blanket, take them to the couch, then hide under them.  Much giggling accompanied all of this, and my heart rejoiced as I saw that it was possible (imagine that!) for Tobin to be included without strife in my older boys' play.  Once they were all in position in their "caves," with Tobin on the left, Josiah in the middle, and David waving on the right, the call came forth:  "Take a picture, Mom!"

Why, yes.  I don't mind if I do.  I'd love to have a portrait of my boys to remind me of how they looked during one happy, peaceful morning in early fall.  So what if I can't see their faces?!  ;-)

Baby Blessing: Weeks 11 & 12

I'm overdue to write a pregnancy post, which hopefully has no prophetic link to the future of this pregnancy when this baby chooses to exit the womb and make his (her? but probably his) grand entrance.  I've only been overdue once, but that was enough to convince me of what a test of patience it is to watch a due date come and go with no baby in sight!  Although my due date this time around is April 7, if I could choose a birthday for this child, it would be sometime at the end of March, simply because I wouldn't mind delivering a little early...and more importantly, we don't have any March birthdays in our little family yet.  My second choice would be April 1; it would certainly make my birthday extra special to give birth on that day like two of my friends--Christin and Julie M.--have done (both of them delivered their youngest children on their own birthdays).  And my third choice would be any other day in April.  I'm not picky.  ;-)

For my pictures the past two weeks, I've been assisted by my capable but (very) young photographer sons.  Tobin took this first picture (I was 11 weeks along)...I think the crookedness of the picture has less to do with any desire to be artistic and more to do with the fact that the camera was heavy for him...I'm just glad he didn't drop it...  ;-)

...and David took the second one (when I was 12 weeks).

As I look at these pictures, I realize that it's probably not surprising at all that strangers are starting to recognize that I'm pregnant.  I was surprised, however, the first night that it happened.  It was actually a Friday night, Tobin's Family Night, and we were going to Country Cookin' for dinner.  I was 10 weeks, 6 days along, so I wasn't quite as big as I am in the above pictures; but it happened to be the first day that I wore maternity pants, and I think that was what let my bump hang out and be so obvious.  :)  At any rate, two sets of people stopped me to comment on my pregnancy.  I'm always glad when people comment on it because I love to talk about it; however, I also always think, "Wow, you're sort of brave to be mentioning something at this stage.  What if I weren't pregnant and this was just my regular shape?  Wouldn't you be red-in-the-face then?!?!"  I suppose I think that because I have made that mistake before and remember clearly the blushing, stammering, awkward, foot-in-the-mouth feeling as I tried to recover gracefully (which is impossible) so as not to offend the woman that I just...offended.  It happened in a grocery store in San Diego long ago, but I like to learn from my mistakes and I've never made that one again!  :)  Fortunately for the people who stopped me to ask about my pregnancy, I was delighted to talk about it, and nobody had to be embarrassed.  :)

One thing I enjoy at this stage of pregnancy is pulling out my boxes of maternity clothes and looking through them again, remembering other times I've worn them, and in some cases, remembering where the items of clothing came from.  I've been blessed by maternity clothes from my generous friend Lisa before; and at the beginning of this pregnancy, she again gave me some (including the white sweater I'm wearing in the top photo in this post, and the black shirt I was wearing in my Week 10 post).  It's always fun to get "new" clothes, and I'm so grateful for Lisa's kind gifts.  :)

A week and a day ago, I had an appointment with Melody, one of the midwives; and it went very smoothly.  Weight and blood pressure were fine, although I didn't write them down and I don't remember them now.  The only thing really significant that I do remember from that appointment was hearing the baby's heartbeat; and once again, it was 163.  Although I had no specific reason for concern, I did have a moment or two of anxiety in the days leading up to that appointment; and it is unfailingly reassuring to hear the sweet sound of that precious galloping heartbeat.

Physically I continue to feel fine, although I think the fatigue that usually occurs during early pregnancy is showing up more here at the end of the first trimester.  Some days I just absolutely must take a nap, but fortunately my oldest two (even the oldest three) are fairly self-sufficient, so I can sneak in a little nap on the couch without too much trouble.  The only problem comes when I wake up and think, "Oh, I wish I could sleep for hours and days longer!  Do I really have to get up now?"  :)

Here is one other tiny "problem," although to call it a problem is really overstating it.  Sometimes I am so hungry, but nothing sounds good.  I haven't had any specific pregnancy cravings yet that I can think of, but there have been quite a few times when I can't think of any food that appeals to me.  It's not that I'm having specific aversions to anything (i.e. the smell of chicken makes me sick - nothing like that); it's just a general blah-ness with food sometimes.  In such times, when I know I have to eat, I usually end up reaching for a few pretzels or a couple of Wheat Thins; they're mild enough that I can tolerate them, even if I don't get too excited about them.  :)

As I go through this pregnancy, I often remember how my pregnancy with Shav was; and I've noticed one key difference.  Tobin was so young when I got pregnant with Shav, and I was often overwhelmed by the thought of simultaneously caring for a newborn and an 18-month-old.  Looking back, I can see how much fear there was in that pregnancy--lots and lots of joy and thankfulness, too!--but much more anxiety than I would have liked to have had.  This time, however, I don't feel that overwhelmed.  I'm not naive enough to think that life will somehow be easy with five children, but I feel a sense of peace about it.  I hear a reassuring voice inside me saying, "Yes, life will be tough, but it's OK.  Life is frequently tough right now with only four children!  Face it:  your life will include chaotic mothering moments for quite a few years, but it really will be fine.  Grace is given for each day, and the addition of another baby won't be the thing that makes everything fall apart.  You'll be OK."  I sure hope that voice in my head is right.  ;-)

One last thing for this week...  A number of times recently, I have seen a mother with a newborn or heard about someone giving birth or seen pictures of a tiny baby being held by its mother and thought, "Oh, I wish that were me."  This is my usual train of thought, even during times when I'm not pregnant and not necessarily trying to be either.  I treasure my children so much that I'm almost envious of other women when they are blessed with another one.  Recently though, when that thought pops into my head, it's quickly followed by the realization that it will be me!!  I don't have to ache with longing for that because I'm already pregnant!  I'm already counting down the weeks until we meet this new little one!  It's almost a surprise to me each time I remember this (silly as that may sound); and once again, I'm flooded with wonder that God has chosen me for this gift.  How wonderful!  How marvelous!  How blessed I am!  How grateful I am!  May I remain that way to the end.

Goggly Eyes

Today was errand day in town for us, and one of our stops happened to be at the dollar store where Jeff let the boys choose an item that they wanted.  Not surprisingly, David, our young thespian, chose something guaranteed to make us laugh.  See?

If that boy can entertain or act or dress up or somehow perform, he does it--wholeheartedly.  Life isn't dull for long when David is around.  :)

The glasses with goggly eyes got shared with someone else.  See?

This is what Jeff looks like after a day spent running errands in town with all of his noisy boys and his wife along, too.  ;-)

Strangely, the goggly eyes disappeared an hour or so after we got home.  David is certain he took them up to his room, but we cannot find them anywhere, despite the efforts of several search parties.  It's a shame, really.  I was so looking forward to wearing those glasses for my next maternity picture.  ;-)

(Almost) Wordless Wednesday {Goodbye, Highchair!}

I put away the highchair and got out a booster seat yesterday afternoon so Shav could start sitting at the table with the rest of us.  How big is Shavi?  SO BIG!  :)

(The empty seat between Shav and my mother was for Kevin the Painter, who was eating dinner with us but suddenly felt the urge to go outside and check on the dogs when I pulled out the camera.)  :)

When the Simple Life Isn't Simple

Months ago, I randomly stumbled across a blog written by a woman whose family was homesteading; and although I cannot remember even a tiny clue about the name of the blog or how I found it, I do remember one post of hers.  In it, she wrote about how she decided to get rid of her clothes dryer altogether, and rely solely on her outdoor clothesline and an indoor clothes rack to dry her clothes.

The idea intrigued me at the time; and I thought, "Wow!  Wouldn't that be great?  If I did that, I could actually contribute to the financial well-being of our family in a substantial way by saving all the money that goes toward the electricity for our dryer.  That would be wonderful!"  Now let me make one thing clear:  Jeff does an outstanding job of ensuring our financial well-being, and I never (literally, NEVER) worry about money.  And not once has he ever suggested or implied or hinted that I should "get a real job" or do something to help us earn money.  But sometimes I do feel a tinge of longing as I think, "I wish there was something I could do to contribute monetarily!"

Was this something I could do?  Could I give up my dryer?

I moved slightly in that frugal direction by buying an inexpensive wooden clothes rack that was small enough to put in my laundry room.  It was so small, in fact, that a full load of clothes didn't fit on it; but I put as many items of clothing on it as I could before putting the rest of the load into the dryer, consoling myself by the thought that the dryer wouldn't have to run as long with only a partial load, so really I was saving some money after all.

And then, something happened that left me no choice.  The dryer broke.

Ordinarily, we would have quickly begun a search on Craigslist for a used dryer to replace our broken one; but because of a unique combination of circumstances, we did nothing.  The broken dryer sat in the laundry room, and I began to tackle the challenge of drying clothes without it.  Ah, the simple life!

Right?

That's when I discovered that there is nothing simple about trying to keep a household of six amply supplied with clean (and dry!) laundry without the convenience of a dryer.  There's nothing simple about lugging heavy baskets of clothes to the clothesline, weighing it down so much that all the lines stretch and one of the poles starts bearing a striking resemblance to the Tower of Pisa.  There's certainly nothing simple about trying to stay caught up on laundry when every single day of the week, it rains (or threatens to).  There's nothing simple about looking at the weather forecast and trying to figure out whether the 50% chance of rain they're talking about will land in my backyard--and if so, whether it will be in the morning or afternoon.  There's nothing simple about finally getting some sunshine and joyfully hanging clothes out, only to have to run out a little while later to gather the clothes because our neighbor (who owns a lawn-care business and mows our yard as part of his rental agreement with my dad--a wonderful blessing for us!) has decided to take advantage of the sunshine, too, and use that time to mow our yard.  There's nothing simple about carrying heavy baskets of wet clothes down the hill to my parents' house to stick in their dryer because I couldn't figure out any other way to get them dry.  There's also nothing simple about the amount of clothes (particularly Jeff's nice shirts) that get so stiff and wrinkly from line-drying that they must be ironed before wearing, especially because I know good and well that if they had only been dried in a dryer, they would be perfectly soft and smooth.

The simple life wasn't quite as simple as I was hoping it would be.

Here's another example:  eggs.  Do you know what's simple?  I'll tell you!  Going to the grocery store, putting a carton of eggs into your cart, handing the cashier a couple of bucks for them, and bringing them home to put in your refrigerator is simple.  You can guarantee those eggs won't have chicken poop all over them, and you can almost guarantee that they won't be rotten (although I know once in a blue moon, a bad one slips through).  Here's what is NOT simple:  having your own chickens, some of whom you raised from chicks which, although they were adorable and you loved the pictures of your children holding them, also left poop all over your porch floor during their stay on the porch until they were old enough to be in the chicken coop.  And then, once you thought they were old enough to be in the coop, you discovered that they weren't quite...making that discovery only after they had escaped from the coop and were wandering around the yard, dangerously close to the pasture and the quick jaws of the dogs who reside therein.  You also discovered that chasing little chickens around the yard is not terribly high on your list of favorite pastimes.  Neither is cleaning poop off eggs.  You do it, but only because you have to; and despite your best efforts to somehow turn it into a fun activity, it's never something you look forward to.  Speaking of the poop...you endure the smell of the poop in the coop, even though at times (especially in summer's heat), you think it might knock you over, even before you get close to the coop.  And don't even mention the flies.

Where once you had visions of how wonderful it would be to have your own chickens and supply of eggs (so healthy! so tasty! so fresh! and free!), you now realize that it takes quite a bit of time and work and putting-up-with-smells and money to have those (healthy! tasty! fresh! free!) eggs.  Not so simple after all.

From chickens to dogs...  Surely it's much more simple to have dogs in the country than in the city.  After all, if you have an indoor dog, you have to house-train it...and take it on walks...and deal with the hair it sheds...and pick up the poop.  It's true that we don't have to do any of that; our dogs have plenty of room to run in our pasture, and nobody cares how much hair they shed or poop they...well...poop.  But even though you'd think they would appreciate their room to run and wouldn't crave more, they do.  And that, sadly, leads to dog escapees, of which we have had an abundance recently.  It is incredibly frustrating to, time after time, look out the window and see a flash of fur go by or, even worse, get a phonecall, ("Umm...your dog is out again; can you come get it?") or a knock on the door which, upon opening, reveals a neighbor girl, with your dog at her heels.  Jeff, the saint that he is, has borne the brunt of all of this; and repeatedly, he has walked the perimeter of the pasture, spotting places where they might have gotten out and using various materials to plug the holes.  This morning, he was awakened about 5:15 by barking and went out, in the dark, to put the dogs back in the pasture and block their escape hatches.  I don't want to go anywhere at 5:15 in the morning, much less outside to put a couple of smelly dogs back in the pasture, so I'm very grateful for his sacrifice in this way.

Lest this blog post come across as one big rant about life in the country, let me hasten to add that I love my life and I love our home and, maybe more than ever before, I'm grateful for this little spot of earth that God has blessed us with.  But I'm realizing more and more that this good ol' simple life, while truly being GOOD is not always SIMPLE.

I could go on and on.  For example, I didn't even mention the area of food preservation yet.  Which is more simple: to grab a jar of Prego spaghetti sauce as you walk through aisle 7 at the grocery store OR to pick tomatoes from the garden, wash them, cut out any bad spots, peel them, cook them, add herbs and spices, fill jars with the sauce, then can them in a huge pot of boiling water...usually during the hottest part of the year, when the temperature in your kitchen feels like it's approaching 105?  The answer is obvious.

From time to time, I read a few blogs of various homesteaders who are really trying to make a go of it off the land.  Even more often, I read blogs of women who are trying to conserve money, provide healthy food for their families, and take good care of the earth and the resources God has given us; and although they may not officially be homesteading, they do look for ways to live "simply."  I enjoy reading such blogs, and I am often inspired by them to find new ways in which I can excel in homemaking.  But sometimes, I have to admit, I get a little tickled by the zeal and optimism of such folks, especially people who are new at homesteading and are obviously still in the "honeymoon" period of that way of life.  I laugh a bit as I wonder when reality will come crashing down around them.

A few days ago, I read a book written by such a woman.  I believe it was in the 70s that she and her husband made the choice to leave their comfortable, "normal" American lifestyle in favor of a small farm that they hoped would provide for them and enrich their life, not to mention the lives of their children.  The book is called Worms in My Broccoli, and the author is Nancy Poling.  I happened to pick up the book one day when I was wondering what to read as I ate lunch.  It's a small book, and I had never looked it over before because it was my parents' book.  It had been left here when my parents moved from this house into a much smaller one before we moved back to the States from Israel, and during these six years we've been here, it just hung out on my Biography shelf, waiting for someone to pick it up and read it.  I'm so glad I finally did.  Although my experiences with "simple" living that I've shared in this post are only a fraction of what Nancy went through, I could completely identify with her enthusiasm (before she moved to the farm) for all the "richness" of life in the country, as well as her subsequent discouragement at all the expense, all the time, and all the labor required to maintain such a simple life.   I found it quite amusing, not because I wanted to laugh at Nancy's blissful ignorance followed by disappointing reality, but because I could identify with so much of it!  I could so easily put myself into her shoes and imagine my thoughts and reactions if faced with similar circumstances.  Hilarious!

I suppose before I end, I should report about our dryer.  After living the simple, dryerless life for 5 or 6 or 7 weeks, the grand experiment (mercifully!) came to an end.  One day when Jeff was off work, I heard a dryer being moved and various noises coming from the laundry room.  I didn't venture too far into that room to investigate, but I had full confidence that some kind of progress was being made.  Sure enough, after one trip to an appliance store to get a part (a fuse, maybe?), Jeff had the dryer up and running again, and I was rejoicing, having learned an important lesson along the way:

An electric dryer is a terrific part of the simple life.  ;-)

Someone Gave Me Roses

It wasn't Jeff.

 No, this time it was someone who has loved me for longer than my husband has.

 My mother, of course.  :)

 She picked these pink beauties from the rosebush just outside our side door, arranged them in a delicate glass vase, and placed them on the table, surprising me with them when I got home from the boys' choir practice this evening.  While I was gone, she also did the breakfast and lunch dishes I had accumulated from today but hadn't gotten to yet.  She sure loves me!

I sure love her, too.  :)

"Wawa"

Ever since David first began to say his big brother's name, Josiah has been "I-yah."  That lasted until David could say Josiah's name properly, but it began again when Tobin started speaking...and with Tobin, it continues to this day.  He rarely says any other name for Josiah.  

Now, however, with the third little brother beginning to say the names of everyone in the family, Josiah has graduated from "I-yah" to...ready for this?..."Wawa."   On second thought, I'm not sure that's much of a graduation, maybe more like a regression.  ;-)

"Wawa" doesn't seem to mind and is almost always gentle and patient and understanding with the little ones.  He told me tonight that he can hardly wait until our new baby is born.  :)

Speaking of "Wawa" and tonight...after a somewhat difficult day in which the boys were all more squirrely than normal, Jeff came up with the absolutely brilliant idea :) for me to take Josiah out on a date.  Didn't take me more than a split-second to agree, so off we went, straight to Sweet Bee (not familiar with Sweet Bee?  Emily wrote about it--and included lots of pictures, of course!--on her blog here).  I hadn't been there until last night, when Jeff and I went there as part of our date; but I knew right away that the boys would like it, too, so I was thrilled to take Josiah there tonight and see his delight.  He was a little chatterbox, talking the whole time in the van, the whole time there, everywhere.  How fun to simply have time with him and hear the thoughts that flow through his dear head.

I love you, Wawa!!  And those freckles of yours?  I'm crazy about them.  :)

Something Silly for Saturday

It's been a heavy week in some respects:  at least, here on the blog, and in some ways, in my head and heart. How about something light to mix things up as we end the week?  :)

As I was going through some papers recently, I found an old copy of this story that I originally discovered in my email inbox years ago, back when forwarded emails circulated like crazy and we were warned that if we didn't pass them along, something dire would surely happen to us.  This one made me laugh as I read it again. (See, sometimes it's worthwhile to be an Information Packrat; the surprises we encounter as we sort through piles of papers and scores of old emails can be very pleasant ones!)  Why did I laugh?  Probably because I can relate to this oh-so-well.  ;-)

Mom and Dad were watching TV when Mom said, "I'm tired, and it's getting late. I think I'll go to bed."

She went to the kitchen to make sandwiches for the next day's lunches, rinsed out the popcorn bowls, took meat out of the freezer for supper the following evening, checked the cereal box levels, filled the sugar container, put spoons and bowls on the table, and started the coffee pot for brewing the next morning.

She then put some wet clothes in the dryer, put a load of clothes into the wash, ironed a shirt, and secured a loose button. She picked up the game pieces left on the table and put the telephone book back into the drawer. She watered the plants, emptied a wastebasket, and hung up a towel to dry.

She yawned and stretched and headed for the bedroom. 

 She stopped by the desk and wrote a note to the teacher, counted out some cash for the field trip, and pulled a textbook out from hiding under the chair. She signed a birthday card for a friend, addressed and stamped the envelope, and wrote a quick note for the grocery store. She put both near her purse. Mom then creamed her face, put on moisturizer, brushed and flossed her teeth and trimmed her nails.

Hubby called, "I thought you were going to bed."

"I'm on my way," she said.

She put some water into the dog's dish and put the cat outside, then made sure the doors were locked. She looked in on each of the kids and turned out a bedside lamp, hung up a shirt, threw some dirty socks in the hamper, and had a brief conversation with the one up still doing homework. In her own room, she set the alarm, laid out clothing for the next day, straightened up the shoe rack. She added three things to her list of things to do for tomorrow.

About that time, the hubby turned off the TV and announced to no one in particular, "I'm going to bed."

And he did.


Can anyone else relate to this?  :)

OK, now it's my turn.  "I'm going to bed," I'm announcing to no one in particular.  Which really means that I'm going to send two more emails, then shut down the computer before going around the house and checking all the doors to make sure they're locked, then going to the kitchen for a glass of water to carry up to my beside.  Then I'll clear the accumulated stuff off the steps, put shoes into various boys' closets, put away the safety pins on the steps, maybe a book or two that goes upstairs.  After that, I'll go into the bathroom and do a Swish and Swipe with my new FlyLady toilet brush (hooray!)  :).  I'll check on all the boys, then read a devotional; and then, if I can't find anything else to do, I might actually go to bed.

But yes, I'm "going to bed"...right now.  ;-)

So Long, Farewell...to Facebook

It's been almost 5 months since I took a leap I thought I'd never take and joined Facebook.  A fun 5 months, yes - but I'm ready for a break.  Why?  Well...

Maybe because if there's one thing constant about Facebook, it's that it's always changing!!  I get one format figured out, and then they (whoever they are) up and change it.  And even though the outcry is strong against whatever "improvements" the powers-that-be just trotted out, they never change it back.  I'm not interested in spending a whole lot of time in thinking about blocking this person and subscribing to that one and dealing with this friend list and hovering over that person's name so I can erase them from the rolling feed of who is doing what on FB and so on and so forth.  *blech*  (Can you tell I'm a little irritated with FB right now?)  ;-)

Speaking of time (which I was a few lines ago), the scarcity of that treasured commodity is really the driving force behind my decision at this time.  These years when my children are small are so short and so quickly passing by; and although I've scheduled my days in such a way that I'm not spending any significant amount of time on FB while my children are awake, I have become very aware that by spending (AKA wasting) time on FB at night, my bedtime is delayed, and I wake up the next morning much more tired than I should.  Now, on the one hand, I know that fatigue is a part of life.  What's more, I know that pregnancy has been known to (occasionally) cause more-than-usual tiredness.  ;-)  So I'm not blaming it all on FB.  But I am confessing my weakness and inability to be self-disciplined and get myself in bed when I should at night.  If taking a break from FB helps me move my bedtime a little earlier, it will prove itself a good decision, I think.

There are other reasons I feel the need to disconnect from FB right now, but I suppose there's no need to go into all of them.  I considered setting strict limits for myself, as far as how much time I could spend daily on FB; and I also pondered the possibility of only checking into FB once a week or so.  But the reality is that if my name shows up on FB, people assume they can get a hold of me there; and I already missed one important message this week because I didn't check my FB messages and, whereas I used to get an email notification (to my regular email address) about new FB messages, I apparently no longer do.  Some other thing the big shots tweaked, I suppose.

I don't know how long this FB break will last:  maybe it will be short, maybe long.  I'd like to use this break to get (at least somewhat) caught up in some other areas of my online life:  email for one, but also commenting more on the blogs I follow through Google Reader (some of those bloggers probably think I've fallen off the face of the earth, considering how much I used to comment but haven't been recently...I value some of those blogging friendships that have built up over time, and I want to be a better friend to them), as well as some other computer-related projects like the everlasting task of organizing pictures.  Fun, fun!

But before I shut my FB down, I took the time to go back through and copy and paste most of my status updates from there into this post, so that when I someday print out this blog in a book (and who knows when that will be?!), I'll be able to remember the things I jotted down on FB, particularly the sweet and/or funny things my boys said or did.  This morning, Jeff called me an Information Packrat.  He did it with great affection, of course; but I couldn't argue with him.  He's absolutely right.  So here are more status updates than anyone wants to read; but when you're an Information Packrat, you can't bear to lose any of this...  ;-)

April 26 - I finally joined the rest of the world on FB. Why? Because I realized that there's really no other feasible way to keep in touch with certain friends and family!


April 27 - When Josiah asked yesterday if we'll eat and drink in heaven, I used Exodus 24:9-11 to assure him that we will. I hope I wasn't taking those verses out of context. ;-)


April 29 - Tobin was chanting in a sing-song voice, "I'm going on the narrow road!" I heard him and said, "The narrow road? I want to come, too!" But I continued to stand at the kitchen counter and did not get in line behind him as he marched, so he commanded, "C'mon! Get on the narrow road!" "I can't right now," I told him, "I have to make supper." :) Uh oh, sounds like the parable of the wedding banquet from Matt. 22!

April 29 - Maybe it's because I only have sons, but there's just not much interest in the royal wedding in our household. YouTube videos about tornadoes, on the other hand? Enthralling!

April 30 - I love the way Tobin talks! Latest example: his declaration at lunch that "this milk will feel me better." :)

April 30 - I took Josiah, David, & Tobin to the movies tonight! We saw African Cats, and I give it two thumbs up. It ties in beautifully to the habitat study that I've begun to do with David (and will do more of during this coming year of school with him). The videography was stunning! Even more stunning is the beauty and creativity and glory of God's creation.

May 4 - It's 10:27 PM, and everyone in the house is asleep. Well, except for me...and apparently one other person, too. From Tobin's room wafts a small voice, singing, "Jesus loves you, Jesus loves you, Jesus loves you..." This is a moment to treasure.

May 10 - If it weren't for eight measures of a Bach concerto, I'd be feeling pretty good about the upcoming concert I'm accompanying. But those eight measures! Bach, did you really have to make them so difficult?! :)

May 11 - Josiah, as he sat down for lunch after a full morning of working/playing outside: "I'm as hungry as a horse!"  Tobin, not to be outdone by his big brother: "I'm as hungry as a donkey!" :)

May 12 - I was lying on the couch this morning, letting Tobin comb my hair (to say "comb" is being generous, but we'll go with that). There was a Bible beside me, and Shav toddled over, patted it, and said clear as a bell, "Bible!" For a boy who doesn't talk much, it's nice to know he's got the important words down. "Mama..." "Uh-oh..." "Look..." and now "Bible..." :)

May 12 - Tobin is upstairs in his room for quiet time. I hear his voice calling out, "Where are you, little white Bible? Where are you, little white Bible?" I suppose the precious cuteness of this moment makes up for him running away from me in Walmart. He was determined to get a drink and go to the bathroom THAT VERY INSTANT and didn't heed my declaration that we could go AFTER I paid.

May 14 - Spent yesterday at Kings Dominion with my five favorite people. Great fun, lots of memories made. But today I'm exhausted and can't seem to get going like I should. Maybe it was that last ride on the Scrambler that did me in. ;-)

May 20 - When you need to lose weight, would you rather eat less or exercise more? I'm trying to figure this out for myself because I have a "few" pounds I need to say goodbye to! :)

May 20 - So far, the best way I've discovered to lose weight? Jump on the trampoline after dark with my two oldest sons. They're brutal trainers. I'd say, "Hey, why don't we take another break and look at the stars again?" and they'd be like, "No, it's time to jump. You need to burn some more calories!"

May 24 - Wishing I could drum up $25,000 to adopt a child from Ethiopia. The book I'm reading (There Is No Me Without You) might have a little something to do with this. With only four small sleeping bodies in my house, it feels strangely empty tonight.

May 24 - I had to smile this evening when I was listening to David's and Tobin's bedtime prayers, and David prayed, "Help Tobin learn to share." Maybe he's never heard of taking the log out of his own eye before he concerns himself with his brother's speck. Then again, maybe he was putting into practice the admonition to pray for those who persecute you. :)

May 25 - In David's prayer tonight: "Please help Tobin start to be a big husband if he marries." Where does he get these thoughts from?? I guess I'll just be grateful that he's so interested in interceding for his brother! ;-)


May 26 - Oh, the logic of a 3 year old. Me: "How many cherries do you want for lunch?" Tobin: "I don't LIKE cherries!" Me: "Shall I give you three?" Tobin: "I want FIVE!" ;-)

May 27 - From Elisabeth Elliot: "The order of the Christian's assignment is: hear, do, know. If we hear the commandments and obey them, the Father will make Himself known to us. It is no use trying to know Him without doing what He says."

June 4 - ‎"Dear Grandma, did you notice that the daylilies you planted umpteen years ago are now rather smashed? I'm sorry. It's my fault. I ran over them with the Gator. I'll try to never do it again. Love, your grandson Tobin" :)

June 6 - If there's one book of the Bible that I keep returning to this year, it's 2 Timothy. That book is PACKED with wisdom and great teaching. It's as if Paul is trying to, in his last words to Timothy (that we know of), include as much good stuff as he possibly can. I can't even choose a favorite verse from that book, because there are so many good ones! :)

June 7 - Happy 14th anniversary to my beloved Jeff Fisher! If I had known then how incredibly wonderful this crazy adventure with you would be, I would have said "yes" the first time you proposed. ;-)

June 13 - I'm turning into my mom. She would often lose one of our Christmas or birthday presents, then discover it lurking in some corner of the closet months after the event. We always laughed about it. But now-that's me! I KNOW I have one more present for Josiah SOMEWHERE. I thought it was in my closet; but since I didn't find it where I thought it would be, I've been reorganizing the whole thing. Still haven't found it...

June 14 - Just tucked Tobin into bed. He wanted to give me a "big, big, BIG fall-down hug." The overwhelming smell of onion on his breath kind of ruined the tender moment for me. Guess who's been sneaking into Daddy's onion patch again? :)

June 16 - One thing I'll never understand: why kids EAT the boogers they pick out of their noses!

June 17 - ‎"A wise man will desire no more than what he may get justly, use soberly, distribute cheerfully, and leave contentedly." - Benjamin Franklin

June 17 - Another gem from Ben (Franklin, that is): "As we must account for every idle word, so we must for every idle silence." Ouch. I'm convicted about the times I should have spoken up, but gave into fear or apathy and didn't say a word.

June 17 - Tobin's Family Night is tonight, so for our dining and entertainment, he has chosen to go to Chick-fil-A. :) Knowing that I don't need to cook supper--or do the dishes afterwards!--has made this whole day exponentially less stressful than other days this week. ;-)

June 18 - What am I craving tonight? Chocolate ice cream from Kline's. It's a VERY good thing we have some in the freezer! Just as soon as I finish cleaning up my kitchen, I'm going to dip myself a bowl. Ah, the pleasures of summertime! :)

June 19 - I was just thinking how blessed we have been this spring with all of this wonderful rain! My heart aches when I think of places around the country that are desperately dry or that are flooded, but God has graciously given us a good balance of rain and sunshine this spring. I don't want to take it for granted!

June 20 - Put this in the Things I Never Thought I'd Have to Say category: "Please don't bite my Bible." Can you guess which of my sons was guilty of that offense this morning? :)

June 27 - ‎"Mom! Wipe me!" came the cry from the upstairs bathroom. "Isn't Tobin asleep YET?" I thought as I trudged up the steps. As I was helping him, he surprised me by saying kindly, "I'm very proud of you." "For what?" I asked. "For wiping me," he said. :)

June 29 - Another Tobin story... In the cellar today, Tobin pointed to a large jug and asked, "What kind of juice is this?" "It's olive oil," I told him. "We use it for cooking." "And for fixing cars?" he asked. No, dear boy, that's a very different kind of oil altogether, but you sure are smart--and cute. :)

June 30 - One of the funniest expressions in the Bible is in Judges 14:18: "If you had not plowed with my heifer, you would not have solved my riddle." I can just imagine Samson roaring this to the Philistines. Makes me smile every time. :)

June 30 - Josiah found me in my backyard late this afternoon. I was crying and saying, "God is with me. God is with me. God is with me." Do you have any idea what was going on?

July 1 - First two items on the agenda for today: take meat out of freezer so it can cook in the crockpot, and mix up pineapple milk sherbet and put it in the freezer so it can freeze! Guests for dinner tonight=yummy food. ;-)

July 2 - Tonight, homeschool planning is SO much more fun than doing dishes. Wish I had more motivation to clean up my kitchen right now. I'd much rather do some more planning for our next school year! *sigh*

July 5 - Homemade iced coffee: my new favorite way to start the day. :)

July 7 - What is up with this headache?? I've taken Tylenol, been drinking iced tea to get some caffeine in my system, AND took a nap. Nothing has helped it. This reminds me why headache pain is #3 on my list of Worst Pains Ever (labor pain being #1, and having an eardrum burst on a flight from CA to VA being #2).

July 11 - On our way home from swimming at a friend's house this morning, Tobin started singing "Jingle Bells." The incongruity didn't stop us, and we all raised our voices in a rousing "Dashing through the snow..." Life is beautiful. :)

July 11 - Three cheers for Free Slurpee Day at 7-11! Anyone who doesn't want theirs can feel free to get one and drop it off here for me to devour. Coca-Cola flavor, please. ;-)

July 11 - A verse I "discovered" last night and loved: "For you have heard my vows, O God; you have given me the heritage of those who fear your name." Psalm 61:5 - THAT'S the kind of heritage I want to pass on to my sons! But it starts with me fearing His name...right now...today...and every day.

July 13 - David found me vacuuming the living room this afternoon. "Who's coming over this evening?" he asked, "Because you're vacuuming!" Apparently, he seems to think I only vacuum when guests are expected. ;-)

July 14 - ‎"The Scriptures give us hope and encouragement as we wait patiently for God's promises to be fulfilled." - Romans 15:4 NLT - I'm thankful for times like these when my love for the Word is rekindled.

July 14 - ‎"A perfect wife is one who doesn't expect a perfect husband." - anonymous - When I first met Jeff, I used to think he was perfect. Now I know he's something even better: perfect-for-me.

July 15 - I guess it wasn't possible to make it through 25+ years of parenting boys without somehow acquiring a whoopee cushion along the way, but we'd made it 9 years, 1 month, and 1 day. Until today, when David traded a half dollar coin for one that our neighbor had. I think he got the short end of the stick in that deal, but he seemed happy. :)

July 20 - Swimming always makes me hungry! Our time in a friend's pool tonight means that now my stomach is rumbling--not a good thing at 10:30 PM. Guess I'll go have a slice of Shav's coconut birthday cake. ;-)

July 21 - Shav had a rough night last night. Today, as I battle an onslaught of negative thoughts, I have to continually remind myself that a lot of my discouragement is simply because I'm tired. Life will look brighter when I don't feel quite this exhausted. Remembering this saves me from the mentality of "life will never be any easier!"

July 23 - In David's prayer tonight: "Bless all the Fishers in the whole world. And bless all the Davids, too." I'm sure all the David Fishers out there will be pleased to know that they've been doubly blessed. ;-)

July 28 - All it takes is one day of miserable sickness for me to appreciate health again!! :)

July 28 - Because I was sick yesterday, I didn't cook dinner, so Jeff brought home subs from Subway. I ate half of mine (Spicy Italian, like always) last evening and saved the other half for today. Finished eating it right now, and you know what? It's just as good the day after. :)


July 28 - OK, homeschool moms, teachers, and anyone else who knows about grammar: I've used First Language Lessons (Wise & Buffington) with Josiah, but he DOES NOT LIKE IT. As we gear up for another school year, I'm interested in making a switch, but to what? Any suggestions??


August 1 - I was *thinking* about canning tomatoes tonight. But, being as it's 10:25 and I just got all the boys settled in bed (correction: *nearly* all the boys...I heard the pitter-patter of Tobin's feet upstairs a moment ago), I think I won't dive into tomatoes tonight. What should I do instead? Hmmm...oh, I know! Blog! :)

August 5 - Earlier this evening, I was sitting on the bathroom counter, waiting for Tobin to climb up on the stool so I could brush his teeth. He looked up at me from his position on the floor and exclaimed in an astonished voice, "You're taller than GOD!" It's not as if he's never seen me sit on that counter before; but for some reason, I must have been looking imposing tonight. I quickly assured him that no, I am not taller than God...and that God is, in fact, the tallest thing in the universe. :)


August 7 - Staying home this morning with two feverish little boys reminds me how much I miss the fellowship of God's family when I can't be a part of it. But it also reminds me that "two are better than one," because Tobin and Shav have played together so peacefully (for the most part). :) Being with their best buddies made this morning pass very happily!


August 8 - Having fun reading Jim Aylesworth books to my boys this afternoon. "Two Terrible Frights" made them laugh and laugh. :) Reading stories to my children is one of the pleasures of my life!


August 10 - I went to a cemetery tonight to take pictures (photos coming eventually), and the big surprise to me is how much my boys loved being there. They didn't want to leave when it was time to go! Who knew exploring a graveyard would be so much fun for young, active boys?


August 11 - Call me naive; but when I saw this headline, "The Augusta County Sheriff's Office has arrested four people for allegedly distributing bath salts in Craigsville," I was genuinely puzzled. What's wrong with bath salts? Reading further, I discovered that it's an illegal drug. I did not know that. I should be careful the next time I'm in the soap aisle of Walmart and start asking where the bath salts are.


August 12 - David, just now: "I don't think I'm going to get married." Me: "Really? Why not?" David: "There's just so many people that I want to marry!" Me (in my head): "Hmmm...that IS a problem. It's a good thing he's got at least 15 years to figure it out." ;-)


August 13 - ‎"Since the children have flesh and blood, he [Jesus] too shared in their humanity so that by his death he might destroy him who holds the power of death--that is, the devil--and free those who all their lives were held in slavery by their fear of death." - Hebrews 2:14-15 - If we are set free from the fear of death, what is there left to fear? Maybe that's why I like to take pictures in a cemetery. ;-)


August 15 - These boys! Josiah renamed himself today; he is now Sijoha, the Magnificent! David is still David, but now it must be pronounced in the Spanish way. Tobin became Binto, and Shav is now Shov (spelling?) which rhymes with stove. When David told me my new name was Mome (rhymes with home), I said, "Well, you can call me that, but don't be surprised if I don't answer to it." ;-)


August 17 - Woken up this morning by the big boys chanting, "Grandma Fisher comes today, Grandma Fisher comes today, hooray, hooray!" and doing an accompanying dance involving lots of arm-swinging and leg-kicking. And smiles, too. It's gonna be a great day. ;-)


August 26 - The only bad thing about being pregnant at 35? Advanced Maternal Age status. I don't *feel* old, but *somebody* thinks I must be. ;-)


August 26 - David, just now: "Mom, could you be a kite-flier? Could that be your job?" I don't think he was really wondering if I would like to do that for a job, but rather was inquiring as to whether that was an acceptable vocation. I'm so glad my six-year-old has such HIGH career aspirations. ;-)


August 27 - At this stage of pregnancy, it all feels pretty unbelievable. But one thing continually reminds me that there's a baby growing inside me: two or three hours after I eat, I'm ravenously hungry again. *rumble, rumble* goes my stomach. I'm going to go scrounge in the refrigerator to see what I can find to satisfy the beast. (Beast meaning stomach, NOT the baby) ;-)


August 27 - This is speaking to my heart tonight: "Blessed are those you choose and bring near to live in your courts! We are filled with the good things of your house, of your holy temple." (Psalm 65:4)


September 8 - I really don't like to be in a position where I know that, no matter what choice I make, someone (or many someones) will be disappointed. But that's where I'm at now. I'm trying to remember Galatians 1:10, "Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God?" May I hear God's voice rise clearly about the cacophony of others' voices around me!


September 10 - Watching David score a goal in his soccer game was definitely the highlight of the morning. That boy has a grin that can light up the sky, and he was sure flashing it today! :)


September 15 - First night of flannel sheets = absolute coziness. Ah, the joys of changing seasons! :)


September 16 - Last night I enjoyed flannel sheets for the first time. Tonight's almost-fall pleasure? The first fire of the season in the woodstove. I love Virginia. :)

Helpless

I was standing in the toothpaste aisle of Walmart yesterday afternoon, peacefully comparing prices and trying to decide whether I should get each of the boys a toothbrush that spins (I eventually decided not to, but that's not the point of this story), when I suddenly heard loud voices approaching on my left.  Down the main aisle of the store stomped Angry Voice #1, a man, who shouted, "That's the last time you'll ever speak to me like a dog!"  And then Angry Voice #2, a woman, who said, just a bit more timidly, "But I didn't..."  And then they were gone, their cart half full of groceries pushed haphazardly to the middle of the aisle and abandoned as they, presumably, marched out of the store.

I didn't even see them.  The whole thing happened so fast and so unexpectedly that I didn't even jerk my head up to catch a glimpse of who was causing the ruckus.  But even as my eyes stayed focused on rows of brightly-colored, kid-friendly toothbrushes, my heart dropped to the floor, and a sick feeling hit my stomach.

And then the thoughts started...  Should I have done something?  Could I have done something?  Why wasn't my reaction time quicker?  Why didn't I instantly have the wisdom and boldness to get involved and somehow change the situation?  Oh, I wish I could have done something.

Even while all of that spun in my mind, I realized that realistically, if I had immediately stepped into the aisle and said, "Can I help?" the man was enraged enough that he very well might have taken a swing at me.  I didn't have a cell phone with me, but if I had instantly turned to the other customer in the toothpaste aisle and said, "Can I borrow your cell phone?" and then called the police, what would I have said?  "Ummm...I just heard two people yelling at each other in Walmart, and I'm afraid the man might hurt the woman.  But I didn't even see them, so I can't give you any physical description at all."  Not tremendously helpful, to say the least.

When I was telling Jeff about it after I got home, he agreed that there was nothing I could have done in that situation.  I know he's right, but I don't want to be the kind of person who stands by and does nothing while a crime happens or an accident occurs or people suffer.  I want to be the Good Samaritan, not the priest and not the Levite who passed by on the other side of the road.  Was there risk for the Good Samaritan in what he did?  Absolutely!  I used to think about the inconvenience and expense for him; and yes, there were those. But there was also danger.  He put himself in harm's way to save the life of a man traditionally considered his enemy.  In my own life, how do I balance that with a need to be wise and careful, mindful not only of my own life but the little one within me?  In my opinion, an awful lot of unrighteous inaction occurs, all in the name of "being wise."  I wish it weren't so.

As I pondered all of this last night while I mopped the bathroom floor and cleaned out the refrigerator and put away groceries and shined my sink, God brought words of comfort to my mind.  Praise be to God who knows each sparrow and, likewise, holds each of us in His hand--the fuming, possibly abusive man; the furious, yet fearful woman; and the woman in the toothpaste aisle, quivering in the midst of it and wondering how she could make a difference.

Wordless Wednesday {Fall Is for Preparing}

WiW #7 - My Bookmark Convicted Me

I woke up this morning with a mental to-do list that was laughable, both in its length and impossibility; but I didn't feel like laughing.  I slogged my way through the morning, striving to be the gentle, peaceful mother that I'd like to be for my boys, but knowing by the edge in my voice that I was failing.  *sigh*

When my lunchtime came, after the boys were settled down for naps and quiet time, I sat down with a fried egg sandwich and a book--Preacher on Wheels by Paul Hostetler was today's selection.  As I opened it and found the page I'd been reading, I glanced at the bookmark I was using.  It happened to be part of a card that someone had sent me years ago; and on the back, this is what it said:

It was my usual end-of-day confession of failure.  Letters I hadn't written, phone calls I hadn't made, opportunities for kindness I hadn't seized upon.  God must be as tired of hearing these bedtime laments as I am of making them, I thought. 

That's when some pictures I'd seen that morning popped into my mind.  There were no captions, just 30 black-and-white drawings tracing a day in the life of a cymbal player.  The musician wakes up, shaves, dresses, eats breakfast, studies his score.  Finally he puts his cymbals in their case, travels to the concert hall, and takes his place in the percussion section of the orchestra. 

He waits quietly through most of the program.  As his time to perform approaches, he seizes the cymbals and stands up, breathlessly watching the conductor's baton.  The big moment comes!  He clashes the cymbals together, one ringing, reverberating, perfectly timed note. 

His allotted role accomplished, he leaves the stage, puts on his hat and coat, travels home, enjoys dinner, yawns, puts on his pajamas, brushes his teeth, and goes to bed supremely content. 

The cymbal player did the one thing required of him.  Did I, I wondered?  Maybe in the multiplicity of each day's events there was a single assignment for me.  Maybe if I watched the Conductor more closely I would discover what it was.

~ Elizabeth Sherrill

Wow.  I needed that.  I was so inspired that after I finished my sandwich, I decided to do "the one thing required of [me]."

So I did the dishes.  :)

And I felt much better.

I didn't get everything crossed off my to-do list today, and I already know I won't accomplish everything I'd like to do tomorrow either.  But here's a part of my plan that I think I can actually do:  to look, moment by moment, for the "single assignment" that needs my focus most, and above all, to "watch the Conductor more closely" and live by His cues.

For more gathered words, visit Barbara H.'s Stray Thoughts.

Little Piggies

When Grandpa & Grandma came to our house tonight, Tobin cuddled right up and enjoyed having Grandma do "This Little Piggy" with him.  And then it was his turn to recite it...  :)

Shav kept saying, "See, see!" except with no "s" because that letter is beyond his ability at this stage of his life.  Sweet Boy doesn't understand that before he can watch the movie on the back of my camera, I actually have to finish making the movie.  Some day he'll learn to be more patient.  :)

A Good Year for Grapes

As I type this, four half gallons and one quart of grape juice are cooling in the kitchen, after their turn in the canner.  I've heard pops that indicate they're sealing; and as always, a feeling of wonderful satisfaction comes over me, just from that quiet sound.  I'd have to go back and add everything up again to make sure, but I think the total grape juice we canned this year is 17.25 gallons.  Our grape harvest is officially over.

Last year, our harvest was dismal, resulting in only a few jars of canned juice that made it onto our cellar shelves.  The year before was even worse:  some critter(s) got into our grapes, just before we harvested them, and ate them all, resulting in major disappointment for all of us.  Now, finally, we've had an exceptional harvest, and I'm all the more grateful for it because of the failure of the two previous crops.

"Many hands make light work," quote the wise old grannies; and as we worked up the grapes this year, I often remembered that saying.  We did use many hands:  my dad and my mom helped, as did Jeff's mom during her four-week stay with us, and so did Josiah and David who found new delight towards the end of the harvest in climbing ladders and stools to reach the grapes and clip the abundant clusters before dropping them in buckets.  Even Tobin helped, doing his (small, but appreciated) part in pulling grapes off the clusters.  And tonight as we wrapped up the juice-making operation, Jeff helped, too:  ladling hot grapes and juice into the sieve, going to the cellar to retrieve empty jars for me, getting the canner and filling it with water, etc.  When it comes to food preservation, I've realized how much of a difference it makes to have extra help along the way!

When I think back on this grape harvest, I'll remember...

...the joyful anticipation of walking down to the arbor, knowing that sweetness awaited us there.

...the way Shav consumed huge quantities of grapes.

...his little hands reaching up for someone to give him "more, more!"

...and the way all four of my sons were involved in the harvest this year.

Farewell, luscious grapes.  Thank you for the beautiful jars of juice that line my cellar shelves.

Thank you, faithful vine.  You've been good to us.

We're hoping for a repeat performance next September.  ;-)