I Shall Be Random, Vol. 13

I sat down at the computer tonight, intending to do a blog post with a little bit of this and a little bit of that in it.  When I looked up "I Shall Be Random" to see what volume number I was ready for, I discovered this long-abandoned volume 13 post lurking in my drafts folder, begun way back in February of this year.  I had jotted down a few thoughts in the first four points.  Let's see if I can go back in time mentally and finish out these bits and pieces from eight months ago before I dive into the new ones...

~ 1 ~

One of my all-time favorite things to do with my children is read to them.  Whether it's the Bible, a history book, poetry, a work of fiction, science, or whatever else, there is something special that happens when we share the wonder of the written word--the way the same 26 letters, rearranged, express so vividly the entire range of human experience. I never get tired of it.

Recently, here are two bits of writing that we particularly enjoyed.  (There are so many more, but I can't quote them all!)

From a silly poem by Mary Mapes Dodge, "The Mayor of Scuttleton"...
"He loaded a shovel and tried to shoot,
And killed the calf in the leg of his boot."

From Anne of Avonlea, in the chapter "Marilla Adopts Twins"...
"You're never safe from being surprised till you're dead." - Mrs. Rachel Lynde (Oh, good old Mrs. Lynde, you fountain of wisdom, you!)

~ 2 ~

Every so often, I announce a special giving project that I would like to do with the kids: giving money to Heifer International, for example, or pooling our money to help support a friend who spent the summer serving as a missionary in an Arab country.  At the beginning of this year, one of the rewarding projects we did was buying food for the food pantry, and the kids chipped in generously with their own money.  It was sweet indeed to have them each raid their personal banks and decide how much they wanted to give, and then take the list of needed food to the store and let them help to choose the food items we would purchase for the food pantry.  Every time I bring up an opportunity like this, I am blown away by how eager they are to help and how freely they give from their own money.  They inspire me!

~ 3 ~

Josiah had a very active tournament season last year with NCFCA, and I was proud of him over and over as he developed his communication skills.  But one of the unseen acts he did that made me just as proud of him as anything public he did was helping David and Tobin with their interps (a kind of dramatic speech) that they each did at one of the tournaments we went to (this particular tournament had a level of competition for the younger kids--not something that all the tournaments do).  What a joy to sit back and watch him coach his younger brothers -- not only because he saved me a lot of work! ;-) -- but because it demonstrated his servant's heart.

~ 4 ~

One night at the supper table, Moriah made us all laugh uproariously when she asked, "Dad, do I have nipples?"  :)   She meant dimples, and probably wasn't sure why we all burst out in laughter.  :)  Nipples...dimples...it's easy to see how a young child could get those two similar words confused!  :)


And now, on to the new snippets from much more recently than February!  :)

~ 5 ~

Sometimes when I see Shav playing, I'm reminded so much of how Josiah played in his younger years.  They both had/have such focus, such ability to concentrate, such delight in using various objects to stand for soldiers and armies and other entities, such complicated battle plans devised in their creative minds, such strategy!

~ 6 ~

When I was pregnant with Tobin, I was vacuuming one day and, as I crouched slightly, something caught in my knee, and then such intense pain seized me that I could hardly bear it.  That's been about a decade ago, and I still remember it with a grimace.

The same kind of thing happened to me again a few nights ago, only this time I wasn't vacuuming but was instead in the top of a bunk bed, changing Moriah's sheets.  At all times, changing the sheets of a bunk bed is WAY down on my list of Fun Activities to Do; but I've never had such a painful time of it before!  But for whatever reason, the position I was in led my knee to clench up and then "tear," shooting daggers all through me.  It was miserable.

The thing that makes me laugh about it now was that I was really in an absurd position.  Stuck on my hands and knees on the top of the bed, I was afraid to move for fear of that terrible pain shooting through me again; and so I stayed there a while, trying desperately to figure out whether I should shift my weight to the right or the left so I could roll over (neither option seemed likely to give me much relief, so it was the lesser of two evils), and then trying to decide the best plan for getting down from the bunk bed.  Tobin, Shav, and Moriah were my audience; and as they watched, Tobin asked, "Is there anything I can do for you, Mom?", and Shav wondered, "Are you crying from pain or from laughter?" (it was both--although my kids are well accustomed to seeing me cry from emotion, whether happy or sad, they have not often seen me cry from physical pain, so it caught them off guard), and Moriah declared, "I'm going to pray for you!" which she did immediately, out loud.

Meanwhile, I still remained on the top bunk, feeling completely stuck and absolutely ridiculous.  When I muttered something about the stupid situation I was in, Shav was quick to remind me that we shouldn't say "stupid."  I'm so glad I have children to remind me of lofty moral principles when I'm suffering!!  ;-)

Eventually, I was able to change my position and inch my way to the ladder, then oh-so-carefully lower myself to the ground where I could give goodnight hugs and then hobble to the couch after putting on a knee brace left over from my high school days when I played basketball!  I didn't get anything else on my to-do list done that night, that's for sure!

Thankfully, except for a little residual pain the next day which reminded me to be cautious with that knee, I haven't had any lingering effects.

I'm not eager to crawl up on that bunk bed again though!  ;-)

~ 7 ~

One of our local colleges, Bridgewater College (my parents' alma mater), had the privilege of hosting Mark Kelly who gave a talk that was open to the public a few nights ago.  Jeff took Josiah, Tobin, and Shav to it, while I took David to his gymnastics class (and Moriah and Benjamin tagged along with me).  I was pretty much in awe of the fact that we had such a famous person appearing in our town, and I was completely thrilled for Shav who had been inspired by something we had done recently in our homeschool and had watched quite a few YouTube videos about astronauts and the International Space Station, etc., before declaring that he, too, wants to be an astronaut when he grows up.  And then, just a few nights later, he got to hear Mark Kelly speak.  Perfect timing!

At the end of Kelly's speech, there was an open mic time for questions from the audience; and Shav boldly got up in front of all those people to ask him a question!  Shav's query: "Was the International Space Station fun?"  And Mark Kelly responded that it was indeed fun to be at the ISS, then went on to tell a story about some of the fun things they had done there.

I know Jeff, Josiah, and Tobin all enjoyed the evening very much; but I'm especially happy for Shav that he got to hear a real live hero speak...and then direct a question to him personally!  :)

~ 8 ~

One of our local treasures is a discount grocery store called Sharp Shopper; and last Friday, when I had a few minutes free before picking up Josiah and David from their Spanish class, I slipped in to see what kind of bargains I could find.  Here's what I discovered...  :)

 I was excited to find the coffee yogurt (my absolute favorite) because the store where I normally get it has not been carrying it recently, so when I saw it--and then noticed that it was 4 for $1--I quickly decided to stock up.  But then, I noticed that there were other kids of yogurt that were also 4 for $1, so I got the fruit kinds that are on the right in the picture.  But then!

The yogurt in the center of the picture comes in a 4-pack, and the original price of those 4-packs was 6 for $1.  That is, 24 yogurt cups for one dollar.  But then!!  The price was reduced, and it was now 10 of the 4-packs for $1.  Yes, 40 yogurt cups for 100 pennies.  Fantastic!!

All my kids love yogurt, and it's so convenient to have some on hand for snacks and quick meals.  My only problem was fitting them all in the refrigerator when I got home!  :)

~ 9 ~

Music is a huge part of my life, and on a normal day at home, not too much time goes by without me turning on one of my Pandora channels or one of my YouTube playlists--although these days, when I do that, it's not uncommon for one of my kids to pipe up and ask if we can listen to his or her playlist instead!  ;-)

As I listen to Pandora, a lot of the songs that come on are familiar to me; but sometimes (and fairly often recently), new ones pop up.  In that way, I've discovered some new favorites in the past week or so; and quite a few of them, I've realized, have come from the groups Rend Collective and I Am They.

Here's a sample from I Am They...



...and one from Rend Collective.


I love how music acts as a powerful weapon in the spiritual battles of daily life!

~ 10 ~

Something historic happened this week: Josiah, who had long delayed getting a Facebook account FINALLY decided to get one.  Even his grandpa got one before he did!!  ;-) 

I think Josiah has really enjoyed having this avenue for connecting with friends, old and new.  David has already announced that the day he turns 13, he's going to get Facebook!  :)

~ 11 ~

And speaking of Facebook, here is a snippet that I posted there earlier today but want to include here, for memory's sake.  :)

Real-life conversation in my kitchen this morning...

Tobin, age 9: "Why do you guys like to stay in your pajamas, like, half the day?"

David, age 12: "Hypocrite."
and Me, age 41, simultaneously: "You're in your pajamas!"

Tobin, looking down at his legs and seeing them covered in pajamas pants, then beginning to grin sheepishly: "Oh."

* laughter erupting from all of us *

It was 11:07 a.m.  Does that count as "half the day"?  :)

I will add that, of all the people in the kitchen at that moment, I was the only one who wasn't wearing pajamas.  ;-)

I Shall Be Random, Vol. 12

 ~ 1 ~

This past summer, Josiah developed a new love: composing music.  He spent HOURS arranging pieces and writing new ones, and he especially enjoyed using Noteflight because he could compose for a wide variety of instruments and then listen to how it would sound.  

When I was in college, I did a little composing; I think all of us music majors had to try our hand at it.  I did fine with it, but never came close to approaching Josiah's aptitude and love for music composition.  He amazes me for a few reasons...

First, he's significantly younger than I was when I composed.  Second, he doesn't know music theory NEARLY as well as I did, and yet he's able to compose music that sounds really, really beautiful, even without the theoretical knowledge behind it.  Third, I limited my music composition/arranging to instruments that I knew well: piano, voice, violin, guitar, a little flute.  That's about it.  Josiah composes for all kinds of different instruments: woodwinds, brass, string, percussion, etc.  His lack of knowledge about the instruments doesn't make him shy away from any of them. Fourth, he composes so quickly!  He can sit down at the computer, start writing, and within a few hours have a pretty decent piece.  Sometimes he makes revisions the next day, and sometimes he even goes back some days or weeks down the road and changes a few things in his pieces; but usually, the process doesn't take him long at all.

It is fascinating to me to watch this gift of Josiah's emerge!

~ 2 ~

We are all big fans of Josiah's music and are very used to hearing it blare forth from the computer speakers.  But last Wednesday, a new piece that Josiah was composing brought forth an unusual reaction from Benjamin.

Josiah was at the computer in the living room, working on his piece; and Benjamin was in the high chair in the kitchen.  The piece, called "Windscape," began with some basic percussion, but then the flute comes in with a mournful tune; and it actually uses a kind of electronic bend that wouldn't be entirely possible in real life.  ;-)  I happened to glance over at Benjamin and saw his dear little face wrinkle up as he began to cry.  I was getting ready to get him out of the high chair anyway, so I didn't think too much of it--maybe he was just tired of being confined and so he fussed because of that.  But I wondered...

And then Josiah started playing "Windscape" again, and the exact thing happened.  The percussion section didn't elicit a reaction; but as soon as the flute part began, Benjamin jerked his head around, his face wrinkled up, he leaned closer to me to bury his head in my shoulder, and he wailed.

"That CAN'T be just a coincidence," I thought.  "I've heard of babies who have a strong emotional response to a certain song or certain types of music, but I haven't seen anything quite like that in my own babies."

We waited a little, then repeated the experiment; and sure enough, as soon as the scooping flute came in, Benjamin's reaction was the same, and he ended in tears.

This was curious enough to me that I wanted to capture it on video, so I asked David to try to record Benjamin's reaction while being inconspicuous.  We all tried to act normal while Josiah played his song yet again; this was the fourth time.  Benjamin's reaction is recorded below.

Part of me felt sorry for my dear little boy who was so moved by Josiah's song, but the other part of me was so thoroughly amused that I could barely keep from laughing.  Most of all, I was so intrigued by Benjamin's reaction.  For four times, when he heard measure 9 in "Windscapes," his facial expression and body language repeated, ending in a cry.

After David took the video, he held it up to me so I could see it; and as Benjamin heard the music on the video, he repeated the reaction again!  Clearly, something in it really bothered him.

It must have been a day or two later.  Jeff and I were upstairs in our room with Benjamin on the bed between us while Josiah was in the living room at the computer, working on this piece.  As soon as it began to play, Benjamin's ears perked up, so to speak, and he was alert and tuned in to it.  But that time he didn't cry.  Maybe he had gotten used to it, or maybe he wasn't troubled by it because he was further away from it and it wasn't so loud, or maybe he felt secure because he was close to his daddy and was looking right at Jeff.  Who knows?  In any case, it sure was interesting to see how moved he had been by that song!

~ 3 ~

They say misfortunes come in threes, and I'm inclined to believe them.  You see, earlier this week, our toilet malfunctioned, and the water wouldn't automatically fill into the tank to allow another flush.  Jeff said he could fix it and would pick up the parts on Wednesday, which happened to be the day we realized that our washing machine was toast.  It would fill with water and drain, but wouldn't spin or agitate.  Jeff looked around online but couldn't find anything for less than $400, so he went to the appliance and building supply part of Mercy House thrift store and found a used one for $125.  When he got home with that, I reluctantly said, "I really hate to tell you this, but I can't get the vacuum to work."  I had used it that very morning, and it did fine; but the next time I plugged it in, it wouldn't turn on at all.  Jeff took it apart and looked at it until he discovered the problem--some carbon piece that does something or other in the motor or some such thing--then, for a temporary solution, used a small carbon piece that came from an old set of barber clippers, and then the vacuum turned on.  

In one day, Jeff was a plumber, an electrician, and an appliance repair person.

The next day, I think he was happy to go be a barber again.  ;-)

I know I was happy to have a functioning vacuum, washing machine, and toilet again!!!  I'm so glad I married him!  :)

~ 4 ~

Tobin reached a huge milestone yesterday, and I would be remiss if I didn't make mention of it here.

Do you remember when I, more than three years ago, wrote about the difficulties he was having in learning to read?  And do you remember when, a year and a half ago, he achieved the feat of officially reading his first book?  Well, since that time, he has improved greatly; but it's been a long, slow journey.  As a matter of fact, it wasn't until he turned eight--this incident literally happened either on his birthday or right around it--that, for the first time, instead of saying, "I can't read," which was his normal response when the subject came up, or "I can read a little," which was the response I had been teaching him to use, he said, "I can read--A LOT!"  

But one thing he hadn't done--because I hadn't required it or even really suggested it--was finishing the reading book we had used for Josiah's reading lessons and David's reading lessons and, yes, Tobin's reading lessons.  We had gotten to something like Lesson 89, but had set it aside and Tobin ended up reading from other books.  Nothing wrong with that, but it just felt a little...well...unfinished.  

His reading ability was such that he could have finished the reading book well before now; but as it turned out, yesterday was the day that he officially read it all the way to the end.  Lesson 100, completed!

It felt good to bring that part of his reading journey to a definite conclusion.  It wasn't always a smooth path, but there's joy and satisfaction in sticking with something and seeing it through to the end.  I'm proud of him.  

AND I'm excited to watch as he advances further and further in his reading!  :)

~ 5 ~

For some reason, the leaves on our trees and many of the trees around here are just not as brilliant this year as they are sometimes.  They're turning colors, but certainly not as splendidly as I've seen them other years.  I'm sure there are some very specific reasons for that, but I don't know them!  Maybe one of my scientist friends will enlighten me.  :)

The lack of gorgeous colors doesn't mean they're not fun to jump in though.  :)  I was watching from an upstairs window and captured this through the screen; that's the reason for the funny lines in it.

~ 6 ~

Last night, when our friends Ryan and Sarah were here, Moriah was SO excited about playing Spot It (I believe it was a first for her to be able to play it on her own); and she cracked us all up with how she played it.  She would, like you're supposed to, find an item on her card that matched the card on the pile in the middle; but the game moves so fast that by the time she did, three or four other cards would have been laid, thereby changing the top card and negating her match.  But she didn't understand that and would happily shout out "MOON!" or "HEART!" or whatever item she had found that had matched (three or four cards ago) and would place her card on the pile.  We were all getting such a kick out of her joy and enthusiasm that we let her mistakes slide and allowed her to keep playing her version; she even "won" a time or two.  :)  Soon enough, she'll learn to play it correctly; but she might never get quite as much pleasure from it as she did last night when she was so happy I thought she might burst.  :)

After that, we watched the movie Up together...and Ryan and Sarah got a taste of what a family with six kids does for fun.  They were good sports about it.  ;-)

~ 7 ~

There are certain passages of the Bible that nearly always make me cry when I read them, but Isaiah 6 is not one of them.  It IS, however, my first favorite section of the Bible; from a very early age, the description of the glory of the Lord and Isaiah's willingness to respond to God's call moved me deeply, but I didn't CRY about it.

Until a few days ago when I was reading it aloud to the kids from The Children's Bible as we began our homeschool day together.

All of a sudden, my throat got all choked up, and I blinked furiously to try to hold back the tears, and I tried to act like everything was normal...but couldn't.  David reached for the Bible and read it aloud while I sat there and tried not to bawl.  My goodness!

I'm not sure what affected my emotions so much this time.  My kids aren't either!  They're often puzzled by my teary eyes, but it's not really something I can explain.  If my sons happen to marry women who are quick to cry, maybe they'll have an extra measure of compassion and grace for them because they've seen their mother's eyes begin to water suspiciously so many times!  :)

~ 8 ~

One account in the Bible that does bring the tears almost every time I read it is the story of Joseph, but I don't want to talk about the tears part right now.  Instead, here are a few other things that stand out to me.

In Genesis 47:2, when Joseph chooses five of his brothers and presents them to Pharaoh, I always wonder, "Which ones?"  :)

Later in that chapter, Joseph presents his father Jacob to Pharaoh; and here is this mighty king of the powerful nation of Egypt and this old, weather-beaten, wandering shepherd.  Then Jacob blesses Pharaoh, and it seems to me that in the spiritual sense, all the power in the room shifts to Jacob at that point.

A couple chapters earlier, in Genesis 45:24, Joseph has revealed his identity to his brothers and is sending them back to get their father and wives and children and hurry back to Egypt.  Joseph, knowing well his brothers' natures, warns them as they go, "Don't quarrel on the way!"  And it always makes me chuckle.  :)

One other tidbit from this section of scripture...  Several weeks ago, I was away from Benjamin for the evening; and I really missed him.  I missed all my other family members that I wasn't with, too; but there was a heightened yearning for Benjamin as I drove home, eager to reunite with him.  On the way, I thought, "Isn't there a verse in the Bible somewhere that talks about someone whose life was bound up with their son's life?  I should look that up when I get home and discover who it's talking about."

And then out of the blue, it came to me; and I realized with a start that the person in the Bible who is described in such a beloved way is...Benjamin.

In Genesis 44:30, Judah is pleading with Joseph (whom he does not yet realize is Joseph but instead perceives to be this high-ranking official in Egypt) to let Benjamin return to Canaan and let Judah remain in Egypt as Joseph's slave, to atone for Benjamin's "wrong-doing" (which was, of course, fabricated to test the loyalty of the 10 older brothers).  Judah says, "So now, if the boy is not with us when I go back to your servant my father and if my father, whose life is closely bound up with the boy's life, sees that the boy isn't there, he will die."

I don't want to hold too tightly to my Benjamin's life.  I want to walk in trust that God loves him even more than I do and already has a great plan for his life.  And I don't want to imply that I don't have such attachment to my other kids because oh my word, do I ever!

But I'll just say this: in this aspect, I sure can identify with Jacob!!

It's Not Exactly "Clothing My Household in Scarlet"...

...but my modern-day interpretation of the Proverbs 31 woman's accomplishment in this area means that for weeks, I had been keeping an eye out for an ad for a super sale that a nearby thrift store has a couple of times a year.  And when I finally saw the ad, I made plans to go, even on a day that wasn't really convenient for such an outing.

I did so because I knew that Jeff, in particular, genuinely needed clothes.  He is literally wearing out many of his clothes--and no wonder, since he's had most of them for years.  Both he and I have no interest in going shopping for new clothes--what a waste of money!  But to find them at a thrift store?  Well, that's a whole lot of fun!  :)

On this particular shopping trip, I was delighted to find 10 shirts for Jeff, 2 pairs of jeans for him, 2 shirts for Josiah (essentially the only boy I ever shop for, since hand-me-downs work well for the rest) ;-), 2 shirts for Moriah, as well as a dress for her and a jumper, a white jacket for myself that will be a very nice reward if I ever attain a smaller size again ;-), a little purse for Moriah (not pictured), and a gift for her (also not pictured) that I laid aside until Christmas.

The bill for all of that came to something like 18 and a half dollars, but I gave the shop $20, since I know the work they do in the community is valuable and I wanted to encourage them in that.

So many times, I go into a store, do some shopping, and then think, "Well, my $20--or $50 or $100 or whatever--sure didn't go very far!"  It was encouraging, during this particular trip, to see how far $20 really could go.  :)

I truly enjoy thrift shopping so much that, even if we were given a million dollars tomorrow, I would still rather shop second-hand.  And if I received a $200 gift card to a department store, the only thing I would probably be able to convince myself to use it on would be socks and underwear for the family, things that I don't buy second-hand.  ;-)  Otherwise, one family's cast-off trash is my family's found treasure!

I think the Proverbs 31 woman would be pleased.  ;-)

I'm including some pictures of my recent acquisitions, not because the pictures are so great (they're not), but just for memory's sake.  Five or ten years from now, when Jeff is still wearing these same shirts, for example, I might stumble across this blog post and smile as I remember when and where I got them.  ;-)

 The next two shirts are for Josiah...

 ...because someday it will be chilly enough to wear long-sleeved shirts again, and he has grown so much this year that I seriously doubt his long-sleeved shirts from last winter will even come close to fitting!  ;-)

A shirt for Moriah...

 ...with adorable buttons.  :)

 And one with a cat, which she loves.  :)

 This next one is a dress (hard to tell dimensions from a picture, I know); and I think it will look especially cute with leggings.

 A jumper...

 ...made by Ralph Lauren, which is nice if you care about name brands, which I don't.  ;-)

 And the white jacket for me!  :)

 Kind of hard to see, but there is beautiful stitching all over this.

 And looky there!  Brand new with tags, and would you check out that price?

I don't mind a bit that someone else decided to pay the $58 price for this and then passed it along to the thrift store.  Thank you, unknown consumer!!  ;-)

(Can you tell I'm enjoying this way too much?)  ;-)

If This Were Your Last Pregnancy...

...what special things would you do during it?

This is a question I've been asking myself a lot recently, because I think this is my last pregnancy, and I don't want to get to the end of it and think, "Oh, rats. I wish I would have done____________ while I was still pregnant, but it's too late now, and I'll never get another chance."  I don't want to have any regrets, you know?

So, I'm asking for input--from friends who have been pregnant before and those who have never been.  What's important to you to do during pregnancy?  What are some things I might be overlooking that would be meaningful to do during this time?   What should I do now so that I don't have regrets later?  Similarly, is there anything specific that I should consider doing during labor and delivery since this is presumably my last chance at that?

Any thoughts??  :)

********

I'm happy to announce that, since my last pregnancy update, I have been motivated to do more in the way of actual preparation for this birth than I had been during all the previous months since I discovered I was being blessed again with a child!  For example, I went to Bath & Body Works (something I literally had not done in years) and bought this little treat for myself...

...because during my labor with Josiah, Jeff rubbed apple-scented lotion into my hands over and over, and I was feeling sentimental enough to want a special lotion to take along to the hospital this time, too.  Plus, the name of this fragrance, "Beautiful Day," seemed perfect for such a momentous occasion.  :)

Oh, and I actually put it in my bag to take to the hospital, too, so now there's actually something in that backpack - what progress!  ;-)  In reality, I also packed a bag with some basic toiletries, so at least now I'll be able to brush my teeth and put chapstick on my lips while I'm in the hospital.  :)

I also purchased a few other things: a backpack that I'll use as a diaper bag (being able to use a backpack rather than a conventional diaper bag that hangs over one shoulder means I'll be able to use my hands more effectively even while carrying a diaper bag--a must at this stage of life!); a bath towel and hand towel that I'll ask my neighbor to use to sew a hooded towel for this baby (each of my kids have their own, and this is a special tradition that we must keep up); a pack of newborn diapers and a big box of size one diapers; and, most importantly, a coming-home-from-the-hospital outfit for this baby!  :)

Actually, I bought two possibilities for that, because one was on sale for $3, so I didn't feel too extravagant about buying a second one.  ;-)  I wasn't sure which one Jeff would prefer, so I got them both.  Moriah, Shav, and Tobin were with me when I got them; and Moriah wanted to hold the outfits.  She has asked me about a million times since then if she can put the clothes on "my new baby" (as she so possessively states) and then snuggle with him.  I've said "yes" only slightly fewer than a million times.  ;-)  As sweet as it is to see her anticipation and delight at the thought of having a little baby brother, I do get a little weary of having the same conversation so many times.  ;-)

********

My back continues to be bothersome, but not all the time.  I think overall it's a little better than it had been, and I'm hopeful enough to wish for more improvement in the near future but realistic enough to know that it might not come until after the birth.  Either way, it's OK.

The most painful moments of recent days came on Sunday afternoon when we were getting ready to go to a friend's house to go swimming.  I was in the kitchen, preparing some food to take along, when a foot cramp hit me with such strength that I literally could not move my left foot.  I felt like that foot was simultaneously paralyzed while also tormenting me with incredibly powerful pain.  It was ridiculous, and my kids got to see it all!  ;-)  It took a while, but the muscles finally relaxed and the cramp eased.  Later, however, at the friend's house, it struck again but wasn't quite as ferocious as it had been here at home.  Since then, it hasn't happened again; but sometimes as I am waking from sleep, I find myself, even without full awareness, stretching my legs and feet to try to prevent a cramp from hitting me.  :)

********

This past Wednesday, August 5, I had an appointment with my midwife Marty; and it was another fairly short, routine visit (which I'm continually grateful for since I realize that many complications could be occurring that would require more intensive medical attention).  My weight was 180.5 pounds, my blood pressure was 122/70, and the baby's heart rate was 156--higher than it had been the past several times, but Marty said she wasn't surprised at that because he was in the middle of doing his morning exercises.  ;-)  As a matter of fact, she was measuring my tummy and feeling for his position; and when she said that she is pretty sure he's head-down, I told her that I agree with her because of the way I feel him kicking me up at my right ribs.  Just then, he gave a powerful kick that she could clearly see; and she laughed and told me I was right about his position.  He gave another movement or two that was obvious to her, so she didn't think it strange that his heart rate was higher than normal.  :)

She asked me how I felt about my size, and I told her I felt HUGE!  ;-)  She inquired about what my biggest baby had been (Shav was just under 9 pounds), and I wondered what she was thinking about the size of this baby (or me!) but I didn't ask her.  She also encouraged me to keep drinking plenty of water.  We talked about my back pain, and she said I could take Tylenol whenever I needed it (which I've only done once, but still, it's nice to know I can if I get desperate).  :)  She said heat on my back might help, if I could tolerate it, being as I'm already hot.  ;-)  (Speaking of heat, it was something like 68 degrees here today, which made my kids feel cold and caused several of them to put on sweatshirts, but which felt wonderfully refreshing to me!)  :)

All in all, it was a relaxed, happy, pleasant appointment; and my next one will probably be even better, since I'll get to have a quick ultrasound--ostensibly to check the baby's position, but my real reason for wanting it is just to get a glimpse of him again!!  :)

********

Well, back to where we started in this post...

Before this family (as we looked today when I snapped a quick photo)...

...grows to include another shiny face in it, what should I do to fully embrace, savor, and commemorate this time?

If you have something to say, I'm all ears.  :)

The Second Seven

(Series introduction is here.  The first "seven" is here.)

Before I begin discussing the topic of clothing, let me reiterate what I wrote in the post about food:  It's easy to think about all the things we're already doing right.  But it's transformative to think about what we're not.  I include that here to remind myself of it, because honestly, if there's any area in which I'm tempted to pat myself on the back and say I'm doing just fine, it's probably this one.  But here we go: let's reflect on this, and see where it takes us.

Clothing

Jen Hatmaker, who wrote the book that all these posts are referring to, limited herself to 7 items of clothing for a month.  Just like with food, I'm not being that radical, which might not be a good thing; but to tell you the truth, I really don't think I'm extravagant in this area at all.

For example...

When Jeff needed more space for his police gear (he's part of the auxiliary police force in our town and consequently, has a lot of STUFF that goes along with that--more than I realized police officers have!), I gave up half of my closet for him.  He had suggested bringing home a cabinet from the barber shop to use to store his uniforms and supplies, but one thing I did NOT want was another piece of furniture in our bedroom.  So I said, "You can have half my closet!"  :)  It's not a huge closet either, just a typical 1970's-era bedroom closet.  After I had moved my things over to fit in one half and had put Jeff's police gear in the other half, he peered into the closet and asked, "Where did you put all your stuff?"  "Well," I replied, "I don't really have much stuff."  :)

Another example...

Almost everything we buy for clothing, we get at thrift stores--or, in the case of the boys, we are given them.  I guess folks know that we appreciate hand-me-downs because every so often, one of Jeff's co-workers or some other friend will hand us a couple of trash bags full of boys' clothes.  What a blessing!

I have so much fun finding great items at thrift stores that I honestly don't even enjoy the process of going to the mall or to a department store to shop for clothes.  I was reminded recently of how, when we moved back to the States after living in Israel for several years, I knew I would need to buy some clothes because we had only brought back a few suitcases of possessions.  I decided to go to some outlet stores that are close to my sister-in-law's house where we were staying, so off I went, money in hand, ready to spend some on new clothes.

I very nearly couldn't buy a thing.  In fact, I think I didn't buy anything--or very little--that first shopping trip.  It was just too much, too overwhelming.  Although the shock of clothes-shopping in an American outlet store has worn off, I still cringe (most of the time) at the thought of paying for new clothes.

That doesn't stop me from desiring new (used) clothes however.  I admit to being susceptible to comfort-shopping; I sometimes crave the "happiness" boost that comes from a new outfit or two.  As a matter of fact, not too long ago, I felt like I needed more clothes, and I wanted to go to Goodwill to look for some.  Then I realized that I really didn't need more shirts; I just wanted them.  I didn't go to Goodwill.  :)

I did, however, realize that there are some really basic things that I need, like jeans, so I bought those at Kmart when it was going out of business.  I now know that I should have gone to a thrift store rather than Kmart, but I was curious to see how big the savings would be at Kmart and what they would have left.  When I got there, I ended up buying more than I needed, just because it was "a good deal," which in reality cost me more than it would have at a secondhand shop.  I'm still kicking myself a little for that one.

One more example...

I have very few shoes.  I don't have even a drop of Imelda Marcos-type blood in me because accumulating shoes holds precisely zero appeal for me.  Do you know how many pairs of shoes I wore this past winter?

Two.  Occasionally a third.

I had a pair of brown boots that I wore about half the time (more about those in a minute), and a pair of tennis shoes that I wore about half the time.  The rest of the time (I know my math is wrong) ;-), I wore a pair of black boots if I couldn't get away with brown ones (the black ones hurt my feet and make me wish for a different pair) and, once in a while, bedroom slippers.  :)  (I'm not counting snow boots in this census of the shoes in the bottom of my closet, but I will mention that I do have snow boots which I use, obviously, when it snows.)

That's it.

Now that it's summer, I actually have a few more pairs of shoes to choose from.  Let's see...there's a pair of black flip-flops given out by the Red Cross for giving blood some years back.  I have a pair of brown flip-flops which I make do double duty by acting at times like brown dressy sandals.  I have a pair of black sandals which have been around for...well...a long time.  Last year I got a pair of cream-colored flats at Walmart.  And that's all!  Good enough for me.  :)

Let me tell you about the brown boots.  When I was pregnant with Josiah--let's see, that would be the fall of 2001--I got a pair of brown boots, which I LOVED and wore often.  I distinctly remember wearing them when Jeff and I went country line dancing in San Diego one time.  There I was, obviously pregnant, kicking up my heels in brown boots which I thought were THE CAT'S MEOW.  :)  Those boots went with us to Israel, then returned to the States with us, and I continued to wear them often.

As you know, nothing lasts forever, and so it was with those boots.  After 12 years of frequent use, they had worn out, and it was time to say goodbye.  Here they are, in all their aged glory!  :)

This was the main problem...

...the one that made me realize--finally--that it was time to let them go.

So I did!  I let them go, then Jeff and I went shopping, during one of our dates, for a new pair of brown boots for me.

We found a pair that I liked and that felt good on my feet (an important consideration--one that is, in fact, getting even more important as I get older--I had been having some recurring pain in my left foot, so I knew I needed to get boots that were actually comfortable).  But they cost...oh, I don't know...maybe $80?  Jeff would probably remember.  :)

Frankly, I was having a hard time feeling OK about spending that much money for shoes.  Probably the last time I had shoes that cost that much was when I was in high school and playing basketball on the team.  (Wasn't it true that if I got the "good," expensive Nike shoes, my playing would improve overnight??)  :)  Jeff convinced me to get them, and I'm glad he did.  (Because if he hadn't, I would have had to wear just my tennis shoes all winter!)  ;-)

Well, now that I've described some areas in which I do not spend to excess and I do have healthy limitations in the area of clothing, let me say that there are ways in which I fall short and in which I'm striving to change to be even more like Jesus in the realm of clothing.  I suppose the biggest change during the past few months has been to really assess honestly whether I actually need new clothes or not.  When I do, it's fine to get them and to enjoy that (and to not feel guilty, for example, because I needed new jeans because all my other pairs had holes in the knees).  I think in all of these areas, as we thoughtfully and gratefully buy what we need, we can be happy about that!  No need for guilt trips.  :)

But I'll confess that many times, I don't really need the things I think I need.  My perception of need is so skewed that what seems to me to be necessities actually becomes a vast pool of stuff that isn't necessary in the least.  I want that to change.

So practically, what am I doing in this area to change?  Well, I've continued to declutter--which I love to do and am always in the process of doing to some extent.  As I do laundry, as I sort through my children's clothing, as I open my drawer of short-sleeved shirts, it's just natural to spot things from time to time that we don't use/need anymore, like I did recently with some of my shirts, then pull those out to be put in a box to drop off at Gift and Thrift.

That's just a part of life.  That's easy.

The change I'm seeing that is so much more significant for me at this stage of life is that, when the thought flits into my head, "Oh, we need that!  I'll just go right now and write it down on our shopping list," rather than automatically grabbing a pen to write it down, I now (try to always) pause to ask myself, "Are you sure we really need this?  Are you certain it should go on the shopping list?  Is there a way we can do without it?"  That response of "I think we need this" = "I'll write it on the list" was so quick and automatic that it's actually been surprising to me how much of a challenge it is to go against that.

I'm determined to grow in this area however.  My goals are simple: to be content with what I have, to hold with open hands the possessions I do have so that I find it easy to share with others, and to be wise and careful as I make decisions about future clothing purchases.

And also, to never again get carried away by impulse buying at a Kmart going-out-of-business sale!  ;-)

One final note: if shoes, for example, were a great love of mine and were a huge temptation area for me, I would feel like I had more to pat myself on the back about.  As it is, I hardly care about shoes, so it's easy for me to go all winter alternating between two pairs of shoes.  My "restraint" in this area would actually mean something if the love of shoes was stronger in me!  So if the love of shoes is strong in you, don't compare yourself to me.  All I ask is that you listen for your Master's voice whispering in your ear, telling you what He desires for your life.

Who knows?  Maybe, just maybe, you'll hear His voice encouraging you to drop off a pair of shoes at Gift and Thrift, next time you're in town running errands.  ;-)

(This series of posts concludes here.)

The First Seven

Since I already wrote a lengthy introduction to this series, I'm going to, without further ado, dive into the first of the seven areas highlighted in Jen Hatmaker's book.

Food

Let me briefly say that, to get a sense of how much excess there was in the area of food in her life, Jen decided to only eat seven foods for a month.  And I don't mean foods like lasagna, tacos, and yellow curry over rice.  I mean seven single-ingredient foods.  Eggs, for example.  Sweet potatoes.  Spinach.  Things like that.  Wow.

Pause for a confession: it wasn't rare for me, as I was reading probably all of the seven areas Jen writes about, to have the thought flutter through my mind, "Well, at least I'm not THAT bad.  At least my family doesn't do THAT."  For example, in the chapter on food, Jen describes a time when her children threw away the fish she had prepared for them (her kids were not eating only 7 foods that month)--because they didn't have ketchup.  It tore Jen up that, while millions of people around the world are literally starving (a word my own kids, by the way, toss around when they're hungry, but have ZERO comprehension of what it really would be like to starve), her kids threw away food, simply because they didn't have their favorite condiment to put on it.

I can see why she was upset.

As I read the chapter, I automatically asked myself two questions, "Is this something I should do--to experience a month of only eating 7 foods?" and "If not, what COULD and SHOULD I do to honor God more in this area, shed excess, and free myself up to be a light for Him?"

This is what I concluded.

I don't feel the need to limit myself to 7 foods; as a matter of fact, we ourselves grow many more than just 7 foods, so it would be silly not to eat them!  But my decision to not follow Jen's example of only eating 7 doesn't mean we don't have pretty strong convictions about food.  We do.

For example...
~ We don't waste food.  At home or in a restaurant, we don't take a bite of something, then throw the rest away.
~ We teach our kids to eat what is set before them and eat everything on their plates.  (LONG-time readers of my blog(s) might remember this post about The Clean Plate Club.)
~ We enjoy leftovers and don't throw them away simply because we're tired of them.
~ Jeff and I are not picky and are training our children to not be picky.
~ We really are trying to grow as much of our food as we can; and I am CERTAIN that if not for our (read: Jeff's) efforts in this area, our grocery bill would have doubled or tripled, based on how much more food our kids consume now than they did four or five years ago.  Folks weren't kidding when they said a tribe of growing boys would make food disappear quicker than you could blink!  :)  It used to be, for example, that one pint-sized box of peas from the freezer would be sufficient for our family, if I wanted to serve peas as a side dish.  Nowadays, I always grab two pints; and recently when we've had peas, some of the boys have been "fighting" over the last peas in the bowl.  I suppose it's time to start preparing three pints at a time--which sure empties the freezer of our garden produce faster than it used to!  :)

But even with those good habits (many of which were instilled in both Jeff and I by our parents long ago), still I ask myself, "Is there more we could/should be doing in this area?"

I answered myself with these 7 ideas.

1. Eat the same breakfast every day for 7 days; then do the same for lunch for a different 7 days.
2. Choose 7 meals for supper that we will eat for a month (and really, that only means eating each food about four times during a month, which doesn't even sound that difficult).
3. Maybe once in a while, have a meal like the poor in another country would be doing--just rice, for example--to raise awareness for ourselves and for our kids about the reality of life for many people in the world.
4. Be even more vigilant about using up food and not letting anything spoil (the last little bit of lettuce in the bottom of the frig, for example--but many times, even if it goes bad for us, we feed it to the chickens so it's not entirely worthless).
5. Make a chart for grocery shopping so I can do a better job of comparing prices at various stores; plus, I'd like to keep track of how much we spend on food each month, then work to reduce that.  Maybe the amount that I spend less in a certain month than I did the month before, we could donate to a relief organization.
6. Look for more recipes for cheaper meals--cheaper either because they use things we already have or because the ingredients are just cheaper (dry beans, for example, rather than chicken breasts).
7. Volunteer (with Josiah and David) at a local food pantry, so that we can put a face on the problem of hunger and stop relegating it to some far-off tribes in Africa.  Hunger exists here, in our own community; let's do something about that.

Let me repeat that these are ideas.  I'm not really sure how they'll translate into practical action.  One thing that I didn't want to do was simply push myself to sacrifice for a short time (like eating the same thing for lunch for a week), but not do anything that actually helps someone else.  I realize that sometimes making those sacrifices to become more aware is what it takes to start the engine to make changes, so I'm not denying the value of that.  But if it simply becomes an exercise in "can Davene eat granola and milk for breakfast for 7 days in a row without going crazy?", I'm missing the point entirely.  But speaking of granola...  :)

This past week, I had decided that I would indeed begin to focus on over-consumption of food by eating granola every morning for breakfast.  Granola isn't my favorite thing in the whole wide world to eat for breakfast, but I don't mind it; and it didn't seem like the challenge would really be that big of a deal.  Until...

The second day.

Jeff decided, spur of the moment, to go to work later that day so he could spend some extra time here at home with the family.  He fried bacon and made some delicious BLT wraps for our breakfast.  How do I know they were delicious?  Because I ate one.  Ate it without a single thought that I was already "breaking the rule" for my emphasis on food.

It literally wasn't until I had started eating the second one Jeff made for me that I realized what I was doing.  But did I immediately stop eating it?

Nope.

"I've already blown it since I ate that first one; why not be grateful for the yummy result of Jeff's labor of love [I was grateful, let me tell you!] and just finish this one, too?  Then tomorrow I'll get back on track with my granola plan!"

So I did.

Do I feel bad about it?  Well, yes and no.  Could I have stopped eating that second one?  Sure.  But is the goal of this whole exercise to see how much self-restraint I have when faced with temptation?  Is it really to guard my mouth with Pharisaical legalism so that nothing unauthorized passes my lips?  Does legalism help me in this area at all?

Honestly, no.

I want my heart to change.  I want my eyes to be opened anew to the bountiful blessings God has given us in the area of food.  I want my mind to consider new ways that I can share that abundance with others.

Can those goals be accomplished even though I ate that second BLT wrap?

I certainly hope so!  :)

As I look back over my own list of 7 for the topic of food, I cannot help but think that out of all of those, the last one is the most important by far.  Volunteering in a food pantry is something that I have wanted to do for a very long time; but like with most grand intentions, that desire got buried under an avalanche of "real life" mixed with procrastination--a deadly combination, if I ever saw one!  But like I mentioned in the introductory post, this is the perfect window of time for me to make some changes; and serving in a food pantry is the first major change I'm making.  Or trying to.

As a matter of fact, on May 16 I made the first phone call to inquire about helping in a local food pantry--a big first step for me.  Right now it's a matter of working the scheduling out, and that reminds me: I need to call Tom back to see if he can use Josiah, David, and I on the days we have available.  Mental note: do that bright and early Monday morning.

To conclude, when I think about the area of food, it's easy to think about all the things we're already doing right.  But it's transformative to think about what we're not.

I'm pretty sure that's a theme that will repeat itself in each of the other 6 areas.

I've got some changing to do!

(This series of posts continues here and concludes here.)

When We Got Home from Town

I did something out of the ordinary last evening.  As soon as supper was over, I, along with Josiah, Moriah, and my mom, went shopping.  Most evenings--especially late-fall, it's-been-dark-for-hours evenings--find us snuggled up at home; going out is usually the last thing I want to do.  But Josiah needed to get something for his choir concert this weekend, and I figured it would be a good chance to pick up a few things on my shopping list, so we set out.

When we returned home, Jeff was asleep on the couch, after a long, full day.  When Moriah spotted him, she immediately hurried over to him with a quick pitter-patter of tiny feet, crawled up on the couch, and waited for him to wake up enough to acknowledge her which he kindly did.

As he wrapped his arm around her, my heart officially melted.

The picture isn't the greatest, but the moment sure was.  :)

I Shall Be Random, Vol. 7

~ 1 ~

Last evening, Josiah and David's choir rehearsal schedule was a little different than normal because of their upcoming concert, so I ended up with a gap of time after picking up David before Josiah was done--the perfect amount of time in which to take David and go Christmas shopping (for him to pick out gifts for his brothers).  He wanted to go to Walmart; and as we were walking into the store, a big white van, not unlike our own, pulled up at the entrance.  The doors opened, and the bonnets poured forth.  A group of Old Order Mennonite ladies had evidently arranged for a ride to the store to do some shopping.  I glanced at them and smiled, grateful once again for the cultural influence that the Old Orders bring to our community; but what really caught my attention was an Old Order man, his young daughter held securely in his arms.  Her pink bonnet couldn't hide the shy smile on her face as she leaned down to place some money in the red bucket of the Salvation Army booth outside the store.

Even if I had had a camera, I wouldn't have taken a picture out of respect for their beliefs.  But my heart went *click* and captured the beauty of the moment.

~ 2 ~

Speaking of big white vans...  I've been driving ours quite a bit recently and have discovered an advantage to doing so.  Now when I drive our minivan, I feel like I'm zooming along in a little Miata or something similar.  :) The minivan is so small!  And so low to the ground--no stepstools required to get in it!  And it accelerates so quickly!

It's really amazing what a change of perspective will do!  :)

~ 3 ~

One of my goals for 2014 is to read the entire Bible, and I've already discovered a little trick that will help me accomplish that.  I started early.  :)

On Thanksgiving night, I opened the One Year Bible that I plan to use and went ahead and did the first day's reading.  Why wait for January 1?

It's a great feeling to already be up to January 6's reading.  Maybe I'll actually be able to finish by December 31, 2014!  :)

~ 4 ~

On Sunday, Jeff's mom treated us to lunch at Aroma, a local buffet restaurant.  At the end, the waitress brought fortune cookies; and we cheerfully broke them open to read the sayings inside.  I believe it was Tobin who got the one I liked the best:  "Time to tie up those loose ends into beautiful bows."  After a few weeks of extra-busy schedule and extra-special activities, it's plain to see that I've got a number of loose ends around here that need to be tied into beautiful bows!  I'm gonna get right on that.  Tomorrow.  :)

~ 5 ~

Who has the job of writing the sayings that go inside fortune cookies anyway?  Where do they get all those thoughts from?  (Google searches maybe?)  :)

~ 6 ~

While we were eating at Aroma, Shav leaned over to me and said in a mournful voice, "This world is just going too fast."  I wasn't sure where he was coming from with his comment, so I tried to hide the smile on my face as I questioned him a little further.  Turns out he was already sorrowful over the fact that Grandma Fisher would be leaving in a few days, because "I like her SO much!" he informed me.

A time or two since then, I've heard him making the same complaint: "The world is going too fast."

It IS hard to believe that four weeks have passed since we welcomed Grandma Fisher into our home for her annual visit.  Tonight we had to take some pictures before we let her go back to California.

She...

...is...

...LOVED!  :)

~ 7 ~

During the first few days of a new month, right after I change my blog header and background, I often find myself clicking on my blog at various times throughout the day, just so I can see how it looks again.  I know how it looks, of course; but there's a sense of satisfaction that comes from seeing the real thing in front of me--kind of like when I organize a closet or cupboard and then find numerous reasons to go open it and admire the neatness.  Silly.  :)

Previous "I Shall Be Random" posts:  1...2...3...4...5...6.

My Favorite Place to Shop

When Moriah was younger, we were blessed with an abundance of hand-me-downs from various friends, and we hardly had to buy anything for Moriah for the longest time.  But now that she's outgrown many of those clothes that were given to us, it's time to start doing a little shopping ourselves for her.  I can't say that I mind too much.  ;-)

It's easy to choose my favorite place to shop for her (and for myself and for everyone else in our family!): thrift stores!!  You can't beat the feeling of getting beautiful clothes in perfect condition for just a few bucks.  :)

On our date last week, Jeff and I had a VERY romantic time.  ;-)  We went to one of the little taco carts, the kind that is popping up everywhere around here, and ate a bunch of Tijuana-style tacos.  They were delicious as always, but they left us longing for the tacos we would eat when we crossed the border to Tijuana, back in our San Diego days - especially the price (was it 3 or 4 for a dollar when we lived there?).  ;-)

After we ate, we headed to the local Goodwill store.  :)

For something like $36.07, we got two skirts and a shirt for me, four (fairly dressy) shirts for Jeff, a sleeper for Moriah, as well as the following items...(I hope I didn't forget anything!)...

This sweater, which I thought was so cute...

This dress, which is made from a soft, cozy knit...

And this dress that caught my eye with its cheerful, colorful polka dots.

 When I saw the "3," I thought it would be perfect for Moriah to wear on April 9, 2015 (and on other days, too, during the spring and summer of 2015, as she enjoys being 3!)  :)

 But what really got me was when I looked inside the dress and found this tag.

Somebody's grandma, who went by the name of "Gramsie," apparently made this dress for her beloved (I'm sure) granddaughter.

This dress needed a loving home.  I couldn't just go off and leave it there, could I??  ;-)

All the clothes I got for Moriah (except the sleeper, which she happens to be wearing tonight) are too big for her to wear now, but I was happy to get them as I have the opportunity, then lay them aside for her until she grows into them.  That way, when I open the armoire in Moriah's room and see a perky polka dot fabric peeking out or see a vivid black and white pattern, I'll smile as I think of the future when she will, Lord willing, wear those clothes...and think of the past, to the romantic date night when I found those clothes for my girlie at my very favorite place to shop.  :)