Helpless

I was standing in the toothpaste aisle of Walmart yesterday afternoon, peacefully comparing prices and trying to decide whether I should get each of the boys a toothbrush that spins (I eventually decided not to, but that's not the point of this story), when I suddenly heard loud voices approaching on my left.  Down the main aisle of the store stomped Angry Voice #1, a man, who shouted, "That's the last time you'll ever speak to me like a dog!"  And then Angry Voice #2, a woman, who said, just a bit more timidly, "But I didn't..."  And then they were gone, their cart half full of groceries pushed haphazardly to the middle of the aisle and abandoned as they, presumably, marched out of the store.

I didn't even see them.  The whole thing happened so fast and so unexpectedly that I didn't even jerk my head up to catch a glimpse of who was causing the ruckus.  But even as my eyes stayed focused on rows of brightly-colored, kid-friendly toothbrushes, my heart dropped to the floor, and a sick feeling hit my stomach.

And then the thoughts started...  Should I have done something?  Could I have done something?  Why wasn't my reaction time quicker?  Why didn't I instantly have the wisdom and boldness to get involved and somehow change the situation?  Oh, I wish I could have done something.

Even while all of that spun in my mind, I realized that realistically, if I had immediately stepped into the aisle and said, "Can I help?" the man was enraged enough that he very well might have taken a swing at me.  I didn't have a cell phone with me, but if I had instantly turned to the other customer in the toothpaste aisle and said, "Can I borrow your cell phone?" and then called the police, what would I have said?  "Ummm...I just heard two people yelling at each other in Walmart, and I'm afraid the man might hurt the woman.  But I didn't even see them, so I can't give you any physical description at all."  Not tremendously helpful, to say the least.

When I was telling Jeff about it after I got home, he agreed that there was nothing I could have done in that situation.  I know he's right, but I don't want to be the kind of person who stands by and does nothing while a crime happens or an accident occurs or people suffer.  I want to be the Good Samaritan, not the priest and not the Levite who passed by on the other side of the road.  Was there risk for the Good Samaritan in what he did?  Absolutely!  I used to think about the inconvenience and expense for him; and yes, there were those. But there was also danger.  He put himself in harm's way to save the life of a man traditionally considered his enemy.  In my own life, how do I balance that with a need to be wise and careful, mindful not only of my own life but the little one within me?  In my opinion, an awful lot of unrighteous inaction occurs, all in the name of "being wise."  I wish it weren't so.

As I pondered all of this last night while I mopped the bathroom floor and cleaned out the refrigerator and put away groceries and shined my sink, God brought words of comfort to my mind.  Praise be to God who knows each sparrow and, likewise, holds each of us in His hand--the fuming, possibly abusive man; the furious, yet fearful woman; and the woman in the toothpaste aisle, quivering in the midst of it and wondering how she could make a difference.