Baby Blessing: Week 35

Thanks be to God!  The answer to the question I've been wondering about is exactly what we were hoping for: Baby Girl is head-down, in the perfect position for delivery!!!  At my appointment today, I had a quick ultrasound, just to check her position and the fluid level; and all looked great.  We are so grateful!!!!!

Also today, Jeff got to meet Ann, one of the midwives, for the first time and was impressed by her easy-going nature and willingness to buck the hospital protocol, for the sake of a laboring mother's desires.  :)  We have no way of knowing who will be on call when I go into labor, but we sure would be glad if it were Ann!  (Although really any of the midwives would be fine...)

After our appointment, we went over to the hospital for our preregistration appointment.  Our town built a brand spankin' new hospital since I gave birth to Shav, and neither Jeff nor I had been in it until today.  It's very nice, and I'm glad to have a mental picture of where we plan to have this baby.  After we zoomed through the paperwork stuff (which didn't take long...after all, when you're having your fifth child, a lot of information is redundant), the friendly lady who was helping us took us on a walk-through of the maternity ward.  My favorite part, by far, was looking in the nursery window, seeing a nurse that I'm almost positive was the one to care for Shav in the nursery when he was born, and watching her hold a newborn with a full head of dark hair; it was so sweet that it made me ache.  Knowing that, Lord willing, we'll get to meet our tiny baby sometime in the next month fills me with such joy and anticipation!

But back to the ultrasound...  Besides checking her position, I was also looking forward to this ultrasound just to see her again, to make sure her heart is beating like it should, to watch her move her arms and legs--simply the satisfaction of knowing that all is well.  I don't worry much about her; the fact that she is so active means that I "never" think twice about whether she's OK or not because I'm "always" feeling her move!  Except one night, when I woke up and realized that she seemed to be abnormally still, and I wasn't exactly sure when I had last felt her move.  It was a terrible feeling to have the grip of fear come so quickly around my heart; and of course, being in the middle of the night made it worse.  Everything always is worse then, you know.  

Well, rather than freaking out too much and waking up Jeff and paging my midwife and racing to the hospital in the middle of the night (don't think I didn't consider all of those options!), I stuck to a sensible course of action, got out of bed, went downstairs, drank some milk, ate some M&Ms, laid on my side on the couch, and started counting her movements.  By the end of 10 minutes, I had felt two very strong movements and two or three smaller ones.  It was enough to reassure me that she was still alive.  ;-)  And then, the adrenaline from my fright having left me, I promptly fell asleep, right there on the couch.  :)

As I enter the final stretch of this incredibly sweet pregnancy, one Bible verse in particular pops into my head numerous times a day.  It's Matthew 26:41, "The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak."  :)  Oh, how true this is!  In my silly application of that verse, I apply it to the many times when I, for example, see something that I should do, but my body simply doesn't respond.  "I need to sweep the porch," I think.  But another voice in my head says, "Actually, you need to sit down in the rocking chair and rest for a few minutes."  "My project to organize the kitchen cupboards is getting nowhere; I'll work on that this afternoon," I tell myself.  But not too long after that, another thought: "If you keep pushing yourself, you won't have any energy left for the evening with your family or time in which to prepare supper.  You'd better take a break and not worry about the cupboard project."  And on and on the thoughts go.  My spirit truly is willing to do so much more than I'm actually doing these days!  But my body trips me up and demands that I stop...rest...relax...and let things go.  In some ways, I feel a little betrayed by my body; I'm supposed to control it, right?  :)  But although I actually have been feeling pretty good and my back/hip pain has fortunately diminished quite a bit, I still realize that hosting a growing baby means that my body is not my own.  When the heartburn strikes, and my clumsiness slows me, and my energy disappears like a mist, I'm comforted by the thought of why all this is happening.  And in an instant, that makes all the difference!  :)