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Saturday, August 27, 2011

All It Took

All it took was remembering how, more than four years ago, David wore the same outfit to watch his big brother Josiah play soccer as Shav wore today to watch his big brother David play soccer.  Suddenly, the wheels of time started spinning in a crazy direction.  Simultaneously fast and slow - how do they do that?  My sentimentality was enhanced, I'm sure, by the realization that now, I was sitting on the sidelines, watching one of my sons play ball while my other three sons were nearby...and a new little one grew inside me.  One of the joys of hand-me-down clothes (besides the obvious benefit of saving money!) is the instant flashbacks afforded me as my young ones wear clothes their older brothers once wore.  :)

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All it took was the song "Be Thou Near to Me" by the group Selah coming on the radio, as we drove home from David's soccer game this morning, to take me back to the emotional days of early September 2008.  On the last day of August of that year, Josiah had an incident in a swimming pool that could have led to him drowning (story is here, here, and here); and my heart was torn like an old rag as I dealt with the possibility of losing my firstborn son.  That song became a source of peace and assurance to me, as I processed the thoughts and feelings of that traumatic moment.

I hadn't heard it for a long time; but today, suddenly, there it was.  And just as suddenly, I was back in that year...when Josiah was only six years old...and he had almost died...and my mind seized up with fear over and over that September as I replayed the scary moments...and my spirit fought to find peace.

"Be Thou Near to Me" helped me win that fight almost three years ago.  Is it any wonder that I get a little misty when I hear it?

2 comments:

  1. I know exactly how you felt in those days after the accident. I've only posted last week about a serious accident one of our boys had eight years ago.

    The feelings never leave you, nor does the thankfulness to God.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I have songs that make me cry too.

    ReplyDelete

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