To determine the winner, I went the decidedly low-tech route of scribbling the name of each person who commented on the first post of this blog and the last post of Life on Sylvan Drive on a piece of notebook paper, then cutting out the names and putting them into a bowl. Then I went upstairs to see who was still awake, and David was the first to respond as I walked into the big boys' darkened room. He got the privilege of getting out of bed, coming downstairs, and reaching into the bowl...
...to draw out the name of the winner...
...who happens to be Sara @ Embracing Destiny!
********
All it took was finding a letter from my Aunt Joyce in a stack of papers I somehow found time to sort through this afternoon. And all it took in that letter was one sentence--the last one--to make me miss my grandma fiercely.
This is my Aunt Joyce (and this is a picture of a picture so the quality is low, but it still captures her and a corner of my grandparents' home):
And this is my grandma, with Jeff and me in 1996 (again, a low-quality picture of a picture, but nevertheless treasured by me):
I could write long posts about both of these dear ladies, but tonight I simply want to record how I was feeling today as I unfolded and read Aunt Joyce's letter. She had sent it in a Christmas card a few years ago; and in her perpetually neat handwriting, she wrote about how she enjoyed reading my blog every so often and how she liked the pictures. She wrote, "I'm glad you pause to enjoy the things the boys do and say!" And then she continued--and this is what got me:
As Mother said - the best times are when the kids are home.
I didn't know Grandma said that! But now that I'm growing up, I can feel her heart behind these words and sense the truth in them. And suddenly, this afternoon, with my aunt's letter in my hand, I was missing Grandma like crazy, wishing for another chance to make that familiar drive to southern Pennsylvania, to spot the big farmhouse and pull in her driveway, to walk in her door and smell something delicious cooking, to hug her small frame in a warm but gentle embrace, to hear her voice and her laughter, to see the twinkle in her eyes, to walk around the farm and explore the cherished places there. Just to be with her...
I loved all four of my grandparents and had good relationships with each of them, but this Grandma, being my last surviving grandparent, was special to me. She's been gone for 12 years, so it's not as if grief for her is a new thing; but for some reason, today it welled up and left me yearning--for her and for her farm. After her death, it was sold; and I understood why it had to be; but I wished that someone in the family could have kept it. If there's any geographical place on earth that makes me incredibly nostalgic, it's that farm.
I hope, when I get to heaven, there's a little corner of it that looks exactly like the farm. And I hope, when I get to the gate, she's right there waiting for me and we'll never have to say goodbye.
When she died, one of my most mournful thoughts was, "But she never got to see and hold my babies!" I hope, someday in heaven, that she'll finally get to meet all of my children, and the circle will be unbroken.
But for tonight, I'm still here on earth, missing her. In honor of her, before I slip into my cozy bed, I'm going to go check on my boys again as they sleep and give them an extra kiss...because, even though we had a couple of rough "piranha hours" this evening, it's still true that...
"...the best times are when the kids are home." Thank you, Grandma, for reminding me.
Davene,
ReplyDeleteYou were not the only descendant of your grandmother that shed tears over your blog. It was a very good post and very truthful. Aunt Joyce received those words from her mother and the words are still appropriate in this generation.
Dad
Wow, a comment from my dad! Yippee!!!! :)
ReplyDeleteWow....your daddy left a comment. I share your amazement! That's something daddies rarely do. Mine doesn't even read my blog :-)
ReplyDeleteI am finally able to visit here. Looks like my computer has a virus (still does) and I was unable to open any blogs for a couple of days. Love your new look. Love your explanation of "word-spilling" and, in general, spilling over in life. I know I will continue to enjoy your words, pictures, wisdom, and humor in your new format!
Davene, I just read the part of this post about your grandmother. So timely! We just got back from a brief visit with my maternal grandmother in PA (we also stopped and visited my uncle who just had a hip replacement). It was one of the best visits with her. Also, this week on Thursday we had my paternal grandmother over for supper, and we had one of the very best visits with her that evening also. Nothing spectacular, or deep, or particularly meaningful, just a relaxing, enjoyable good time on both occasions. I am blessed to have my grandmothers alive. Also, this post encourages me to enjoy the times when my kids are home. That's now.
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad you have lots of happy memories with your grandma. I hope to be a happy memory making grandma someday myself, if the Lord lets me live that long.
Thank you so much for the gift certificate! I appreciate it so much.
ReplyDeleteIronic for me to read this tender post about your Grandma today. My Grandpa (last surviving grandparent) passed away early yesterday morning and that is why I was feeling so sad. He and my Grandma left us a legacy of love and faith, for which I am so grateful!
Sorry that you're missing your Grandma, but I'm glad you find comfort in her wise words! I can definitely relate.
Sara - I'm so sorry about your grandpa! It IS ironic that I "happened" to write about my grandma in the same post as the news of your win. Memories of precious times with grandparents are treasures! I'll pray for comfort for you and your family in days to come.
ReplyDelete*****
For my own memory's sake, I want to make a note that later in the day on Saturday, the day of this post, Tobin brought me a book to read to him. It was The Relatives Came by Cynthia Rylant. What a wonderful book! But NOT on a day when one is already feeling particularly sentimental about grandparents. I couldn't get through it without crying. My boys did their customary affectionate eye-roll and waited for me to compose myself.
If you're not familiar with the story, it's about a family that travels from Virginia (appropriate!) to visit relatives. When I read these lines and thought about our own visits to my grandparents' farm, how could I help but be teary-eyed?!
"Then it was hugging time. Talk about hugging! Those relatives just passed us all around their car, pulling us against their wrinkled Virginia clothes, crying sometimes. They hugged us for hours.
Then it was into the house and so much laughing and shining faces and hugging in the doorways. You'd have to go through at least four different hugs to get from the kitchen to the front room. Those relatives!"
Those tears! Those feelings! That love!!!
Great post, Davene! I too share your warm remembrances of Grandma Winters' house, and all the great times we had there. I also wish I could jump back there now, with the more mature (hopefully) outlook and perception of many additional years, and treasure those moments in better ways.
ReplyDeleteI also treasure my Mom's letters, although now with email and free calling on weekends with the cellphone, hardly and hand-written notes come my way. Somethng is special about handcrafted ink on paper...